


Heartlines

by dirtshag



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alpha Harry, Alpha Liam, Alpha Niall, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Future, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Beta Zayn, F/M, Forced Bonding, Government Corruption, Implied Mpreg, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Knotting, M/M, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Mpreg, Non-Traditional Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Omega Louis, Protective Harry, Rebellion, Vulnerable Louis, and insanely co-dependent, everything besides h/l is basically background save for subplots!, harry and louis are sad, he really doesn't like nick, implied/referenced eating disorder, it's very harryandlouis centric, just read you'll see, this is totally a larry fic not tomlinshaw
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-01
Updated: 2014-09-07
Packaged: 2018-02-03 01:46:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 17
Words: 29,043
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1726643
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dirtshag/pseuds/dirtshag
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU where the government has a special breeding program to assure optimal gene passage. After eighty years, it has resulted in bigger alphas, smaller omegas, and fertile betas. At some point in their lives, citizens will receive a letter determining their 'perfect match', whom they are forced to bond with. It is expected that the paired couple bonds within a specified number of days. A lot of people are angry.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> PLEASE heed the rating and tags. some things have NOT been tagged to prevent spoilers. this is rated mature for a reason and it is highly advised that you read with caution. there are adult elements and some things could be triggering!
> 
> stay safe lovelies xx
> 
> and this IS a larry fic, not tomlinshaw. that pairing is simply a plot device that pushes the intended couple together (even though they're totally pining over one another throughout it)
> 
> i'll add warnings in the notes and tags before each chapter if they apply

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is my first time writing something in a/b/o dynamics, so please don't hate me  
> and later on this will have non-con elements that i didn't want to tag because spoilers
> 
> trigger warning for alcohol

No one ever dates anymore. There's no need to.

Louis doesn't know why he's sitting in a pub getting smashed and hoping someone will approach him. He knows it was a dumb idea on his part, since his heat is due any day now, and he knows he's giving off a slight smell so he's definitely been noticed, but all the alphas here have already bonded, so there's really no point. He glares into his drink, trying not to let the smoky haze of the rundown pub or his mixed feelings about the earlier events of today get to him. Louis sits miserably at the bar, knowing that he really shouldn't have come here alone. Even if he had brought one of his friends, he'd have even less luck of trying to find someone to—he doesn't even know what he wants. He tries to decide what exactly he wants when the music starts; it's a sappy love song from ages ago. No one has written a love song in nearly fifty years, so it's completely out of date. He wonders what it was like to be in love as a fight breaks out in the corner, with a bunch of alphas and betas cheering it on.  _There sure as hell wouldn't be so much violence_ , he internally comments as he takes a swig of his drink.  He sits around for another hour, downing a few more drinks that burn his throat but fail to drown his worries. When another fight breaks out, he pays and stumbles out the door and into the street.

The night air is crisp and cool against his face, still slightly sweaty from the stuffy heat of the bar. He stuffs his hands deeper into his pockets and huffs in annoyance at the falling snow. Winter is approaching sooner than normal, and Louis resents it wholeheartedly. He sighs heavily, his breath clouding in front of him as he trudges onward. He jumps every time a car whizzes by and when he hears the raucous voices of a group of really, really big alphas, he feels the need to start running. Maybe it wasn't such a good idea to walk downtown earlier today by himself. He's small, especially for an omega, and he'd have no chance of defending himself without his friends with him and definitely not when he's stumbling around slightly tipsy. He wouldn't be caught dead walking the streets alone if they lived about eighty years earlier.

When he was young, his great grandmother had always told him that being an omega, she had been inexplicably vulnerable and had to have someone with her at all times, and suggested that he should do the same. Louis had always disregarded this since the government stepped in and put a stop to the normal dynamics of alphas, betas, and omegas years ago. Too many babies were born with mutations and deformities, and scientists insisted it was due to poor gene passage. Soon enough, a special governmental unit began playing matchmaker, pairing up couples for optimal gene passage based on their genetic compatibility. Over time, completely strong and healthy babies were born to these paired up couples, so the government continued the program indefinitely. This resulted in stronger alphas and betas and even more vulnerable omegas, leaving Louis at an even bigger disadvantage, so he hurries his pace.

It takes him about forty-five minutes to walk home, and when he walks in, his flat mates are still wide awake. It's quite stressful living in a rather small flat with four other guys, especially when they're all alphas and Louis is the only omega. Louis had been worried about that when he first moved in, but these four became his best friends and are extremely protective of him, so Louis is really not all that surprised that at least Liam and Zayn are waiting up for him.

"Louis!" Liam scolds as Louis shrugs off his coat. He's the most protective out of all of them. Louis finds it rather annoying, so he's prone to rolling his eyes when Liam gets that tone of voice. "I can't believe you went out by yourself. We were all worried sick about you."

"I'm fine," Louis says shortly. "It's not like anyone would try anything with me."

Liam flashes him a warning look. "There are some freaky people out there, Louis. The fact that the government has a pretty good handle on it doesn't mean everyone's following the rules."

Zayn nods in agreement. He usually tends to side with Liam on these kinds of things, much to Louis' annoyance. "Not all alphas are as nice as we are, Louis, you really need to be more careful," he says, narrowing his eyes as he sniffs the air. "And you're so close to your heat. Have you taken your suppressants? You've never been this irresponsible. What's gotten into you?"

"Nothing!" Louis snaps, his blood boiling. What gives them the right to boss him around? A lot of things really, but still, they're treating him like a child. They may be alphas, but that doesn't mean they can baby him like this. "I can do what I want."

Liam and Zayn share an uneasy look. "Louis," Liam says softly. "Did you get—?"

"I don't want to talk about it, Liam," Louis sighs, rubbing his hands over his face. "I'm tired and drunk. I just want to go to bed."

Liam presses his mouth into a thin line. "Fine," he concedes. "But we're talking about this in the morning."

Louis wants to object, but he's an omega, and even if he's not bonded to Liam or any of the others, he's sort of forced into obeying them anyway, his submissive nature taking over whether he wants to submit or not.

Fucking biology.

Louis trudges up the stairs as Liam and Zayn whisper to each other, no doubt discussing his behavior. They're much closer than any of them and Louis wouldn't be surprised that if one of them was an omega, they would have bonded already—that is if they had miraculously been matched up, which Louis still wouldn't doubt.

His hands feel heavy as he struggles with his shirt. Getting drunk probably wasn't the smartest idea, either. After a few more moments of struggling, Louis is able to rid himself of his shirt, tossing it on the tile of the bathroom floor before stepping into the shower. He lets the warm water cascade over his shoulders as he thinks about the letter he and each of his flat mates had received today. He and his friends will be moving into a larger complex further on the edge of town, per Liam's request. He's sort of the leader of their unintentional pack and he didn't want any of them to get separated once they were all matched up.

The program had found his perfect match. Louis doesn't even know his match's name. All he knows is that he's an alpha and Louis will have to submit to him whether he likes him or not. He imagines being cornered by his alpha, who he knows will definitely tower over him, and submitting to him no matter how much his brain screams no. He shudders at the thought of being forced to bond with his match even though he absolutely hates him. But since he's an omega, that's exactly what he'll have to do.

A lot of the time, he wishes that he hadn't been born an omega; all of his friends are stronger and bigger than he is and he always ends up losing arguments since they're always so dominant. He knows his friends would never hurt him, or force their dominance over him, but he can't help feeling babied when he's around them. Louis doesn't even want to think how protective they would be over him if he ever happened to fall pregnant, even though it wouldn't be any of theirs. His mind wanders about, thinking how all their lives are going to change when the bathroom door opens.

Louis keeps his mouth shut as one of his flat mates bumbles around half asleep. Even if he wanted to, he couldn't tell any of them 'no' for even the simplest things. Suddenly, the shower glass is pushed back and Louis squeaks and retreats to the corner, desperately covering himself as the intruder clambers in.

"Louis?! Shit, sorry," Harry mumbles, climbing out and closing the shower glass. "I was half asleep, sorry."

"It's okay," Louis murmurs, making sure to stay behind the glass that has fogged up, feeling incredibly exposed.

"It was your scent, you know," Harry mutters. "Your heat's coming soon, so we should all probably stay away for a couple of days. Speaking of which, where were you this evening?"

Really? Now Harry was going to get on his case about this? And while he's in the fucking shower? "I just wanted to get out for a while," Louis mutters. He's not worried about Harry being unable to hear him over the rush of the water; they've all got amazing hearing.

"Louis, if this is about the matches—"

"Just drop it," Louis seethes, shutting off the water. He wipes some of the steam off the glass to see if Harry will leave, but he's standing there with a look of warning and a fluffy towel. "Christ, Harry, can't you leave me be until I get a towel?" Louis asks, but he knows the answer to this and steps out anyway, letting Harry wrap the towel around his shoulders. "You alphas are so infuriating."

Harry chuckles at this, grabbing a towel for himself. His clothes had gotten wet from accidentally slipping in the shower, uninvited no less. "We're just looking out for you, Lou," he says.

"I don't need to be looked after," Louis harrumphs.

Harry chuckles again, infantilizing Louis once again. "Course you need looking after, Lou," he says. "You're an omega."

"Just shut up, you're not helping," Louis pleads, unable to keep the whine from his voice. Harry's eyes widen at Louis' pleading; out of all the alphas in the flat, Harry is the one most responsive to Louis' uneasiness.

"Right, sorry," Harry gushes. At least Harry recognizes the fact that Louis is his own person, something he's been trying to instill in both Liam and Zayn for years. "Sorry for, um, interrupting your shower," Harry mumbles and scurries out of the bathroom.

***

Louis walks into the kitchen after a rather fitful night of sleep. His recurring nightmare about his match plagued him all night long, but when he woke up, it would be reality in a short time and the thought of it makes him want to throw up. But all that is pushed aside when he notices that Zayn is not tucking into his breakfast like he normally does, and Louis' omega nurturing instincts kick in. "Zayn? What's wrong?" he asks.

"Turns out I'm not an alpha," Zayn mutters. "I'm just an 'overly aggressive beta'."

"I'm sorry," Louis murmurs, reaching out to squeeze Zayn's shoulder. He can't fathom the idea of being told you're not who you thought you were for your entire life. He can’t imagine how lost Zayn feels.

Zayn shakes his head. "Don't worry about it," he mutters.

"But the good news is that we've been matched," Liam offers, pressing a kiss to Zayn's cheek.

"That's great!" Louis exclaims. "I'm happy for you two." Zayn smiles weakly in silent thanks. Louis takes notice of Zayn's slight despondence, but decides to let the subject die as Liam sits next to Zayn, whispering in his ear.

"Looking good, Lou," Harry teases as he saunters in, a smirk on his face. Louis' cheeks turn a violent red as Liam raises an eyebrow. "What're you on about, Harry?" he asks. Leave it to Liam to come to Louis’ rescue.

"Nothing," Louis mutters as he reaches across the table for the jam. "He's on about nothing. He's just being stupid." Harry purses his lips, but says nothing as he puts his breakfast together.

After breakfast, Liam pulls Louis aside for the talk Louis had been hoping Liam would forget about.

"Louis, listen to me," Liam says and Louis is forced to obey, the decision making portion of his brain shutting itself off. He's not meant to make decisions for himself, he's meant to do as others say. Louis hates his omega brain with every fiber of his being. "I know you're worried about your match, but—"

"It's not fair, Liam!" Louis cries, the tears welling up. Liam looks taken aback at Louis' uncharacteristic outburst, but Louis couldn't care less about fitting into social roles at the moment. "You guys at least get to choose whether or not you want to be mates. I won't get that choice because if my alpha wants to bond with me, I have to. I don't want a mate, Liam," he sobs.

"Shhh," Liam soothes, pulling him into his chest and rubbing Louis' back for him. "You're going to be okay."

Louis sniffs. "But what if I'm not?" he asks, peering up at Liam, who runs his hand through Louis' hair soothingly.

"Then we'll kick his ass," he murmurs. "We're not gonna let him hurt you and get away with it. You've got fou—I mean three alphas and an aggressive beta watching out for you, Louis, and we're not gonna stop once we're all mated off."

Niall leans against the door jamb, watching the two of them for a while. "Guys," he says softly. "We need to start moving stuff to the truck."

Louis nuzzles his face against the fabric of Liam's shirt. "I love you guys," he whispers, feeling significantly better, but still insanely nervous.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello! i hope you enjoyed the first chapter, and that it makes sense to you!  
> i'm having trouble deciding what to write next for this, so if you have any suggestions, please leave a comment! thank you!!!
> 
>  
> 
> [my tumblr](http://dirtshag.tumblr.com/)


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey friends this is where it gets mature and violent, so if you are sensitive to this kind of content, please take caution when reading this chapter!!  
> it could be triggering. stay safe lovelies xx
> 
> i would just like to thank you all for the wonderful feedback i've received and it's only been one chapter so far!!! you guys are amazing and i love seeing that you're enjoying this fic!

Louis feels close to tears or getting sick as he and his friends load all their possessions into the back of a moving truck. They're relocating further to the edge of the city, into a complex where their matches are already waiting, except Harry's, that is; he was the only one of them to not receive a letter, but Liam insisted he move with them since his eventual omega will have to follow him wherever. Once each of them is settled into the truck, it lurches forward and takes them away from everything they have ever known. Louis dreads their arrival in their new home because his alpha will be waiting for him and he'll be stepping into unknown territory, which is always unsettling. His fingers tremble at the immensity of everything to come and Harry raises an eyebrow. "Lou?" he asks. "Are you doing all right?"

"I'm so scared, Harry," Louis whispers. "What if I don't like him or he forces me to bond with him?"

Harry runs a hand through Louis' hair, calming him down. "Shhh, Lou," he coos. "We won't let him hurt you."

Louis snuggles into Harry's side, sniffling slightly and relishing the comfort that comes with it. Harry is sturdy and strong, like all alphas, but he's gentle and extremely caring when he wants to be, which isn't all too often, so Louis takes what he can get. "Promise?" he asks.

"Promise," Harry assures, squeezing Louis closer to his side.

 

The others walk through the door first, deeming the place safe for Louis to walk in himself, and that's when he sees him. His alpha is tall and rather lanky with somewhat of a big nose. His dark hair is styled upward and he's dressed in a worn flannel and ancient looking boots. He sniffs the air and smiles, looking pleased. "Ah, there you are," he says, striding over like he owns the place. Overconfidence and large egos are both typical traits of alphas, which highly unsettle Louis when they're too forward with their actions. He's timid and has felt threatened by alphas much bigger than this one, but something about him just makes Louis' hair stand on end. "You must be my omega." Louis nods, his mouth feeling dry. He wants to throw up when the alpha holds out a hand to shake. "Nick," the alpha introduces himself.

"L-Louis," Louis stutters and Nick smiles in confusion when Louis doesn't take his hand but dismisses it, tilting his head to the side and assessing Louis. "You're quite small for an omega."

"It just makes him easier to hold," Harry offers without warning and Nick narrows his eyes in his direction. "Come with me," he commands and steers Louis out of the room.

"But I—" Louis protests weakly as Nick shoves him into a private room. "This is our room," he says. "I hope you like it." The walls are a deep purple and the soft carpet is dark gray. The furniture has a black finish and the purple duvet is the fluffiest Louis has ever seen. "It's fine," he murmurs, not looking his alpha in the eye. Nick circles him, drinking in the sight of him and sniffing. "You're close to your heat, aren't you?" he asks and Louis nods, wanting the floor to swallow him up whole. "Do you want kids right away because we can—"

"I don't want to bond with you," Louis splutters, throwing his hands over his mouth in shock; even he's appalled that he's said it. Nick stares at him, his jaw hanging open and his chest heaving slightly. Louis immediately wants to take it back because now he's gone and made himself the target of an angry alpha.

"You shouldn't have said that," Nick growls, cornering him and Louis' nightmare is now becoming reality.

"No, please," he begs, crying. "I don't want this, please, I'm scared." He crouches in the corner, wrapping his arms around himself to offer himself a small amount of protection. He's crying and Nick is drawing this out as painfully slowly as he can, touching Louis languidly and making him squirm. Louis wants to scream, but it comes out as a whimper and he knows he's completely and utterly fucked, figuratively but the way things are playing out, he might as well be fucked literally as well. As everything gets to be almost too much, the door swings open.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" Harry growls. "Can't you see he's scared? Leave him alone."

Nick makes a bemused snort as he retracts his touch, straightening to stand with an air of superiority. "He's my omega; I can do whatever I want with him."

"He's not just an omega, he's a person," Harry spits, stepping into the room. "Louis, get over here."

"You can't tell him what to do," Nick says incredulously as Louis scrambles over to shelter himself behind Harry's narrow but nonetheless sturdy build.

"I swear to God if you try anything with him when he tells you 'no', I'll rip your fucking throat out." And with that, Harry ushers Louis out of the room and slams the door behind them. Harry pulls Louis into his own room, pushing soothing fingers through his hair and gripping at his shoulders. "You okay, Lou?" he asks softly, quickly assessing the omega in front of him. "He didn't do anything too bad, did he?"

"No, I'm okay," Louis squeaks and bursts into fresh tears.

"Shhh, shhh," Harry soothes, pulling Louis into his arms and pressing kisses to the top of his head. "You're okay, I've got you."

Suddenly Niall bursts in, breathing heavily. "What's happened? What's wrong?" he asks, his eyes wild and dark with anger.

"I've handled it, Niall," Harry says, waving him off and Niall nods curtly, shutting the door behind him. "Louis, if it would make you feel safer, you can sleep in here tonight," Harry murmurs, raking a hand through Louis' hair.

"Thank you," Louis mumbles, nuzzling further into Harry and the protection he provides. He's quiet for a while, his heart rate slowly returning to normal before the adrenaline wears off and Louis remembers just how hungry he really is. "I don't want to go out there again and I'm hungry... could you get me some food, please?"

Harry smiles fondly. "Sure I can," he says softly, pressing a kiss to his forehead. Harry leaves Louis to himself, locking the door behind him. Now that his head is clear, Louis takes the time to assess his surroundings and his further options. Harry's room is about the same as Nick's, except the walls are white instead of purple. There's a private bathroom attached, so Louis decides he could hide in here for the rest of his life. He thinks that could work, as long as he has Harry to get food for him. Louis doesn't know what he's thinking. Of course he can't hide in a room for the rest of his life, that's completely ridiculous. Surely Harry would never agree to such an obscure suggestion anyway. Louis lies back on the bed, staring up at the ceiling and wondering what the hell he’s going to do.

Harry returns moments later with the leftovers from last night, making sure to securely lock the door before padding over to the bed where Louis has been patiently waiting. "Here," he says gently, which surprises Louis as Harry presses the plate onto him. "I don't like him," Harry mumbles as Louis eats. "And I've got the feeling he doesn't like me all too much either. He kept glaring at me in the kitchen and I’m quite certain he wanted to bash my face into the wall." Louis loses his appetite at the mention of his alpha, his stomach tightening in nerves.

"He definitely doesn't now," Louis murmurs, setting his only half eaten dinner aside. "You've got me locked in your room. Which I highly appreciate, by the way."

"Don't worry about it," Harry says, giving him a small smile. "We told you we'd look out for you." Louis smiles his thanks, but it's interrupted with a yawn. "Go to sleep, Louis," Harry murmurs, taking the plate and setting it on the nightstand. Louis jumps but Harry remains poised for attack when there's a sudden pounding on the door paired with muffled shouting and grunting.

Louis immensely wants to disappear, or at least be coddled. "Can you lie down with me?" he squeaks, trying to ignore the sounds from the other side of the door.

Harry looks like he's about to say no, so Louis makes himself look as vulnerable as possible, which isn't difficult considering what he's just experienced. Harry nods, thoroughly pleasing the small omega, crawling in with Louis and cuddling him to his chest. Louis knows this is a bad idea, but he doesn't want to face what's on the other side of the door anytime soon. He focuses on listening to the steady rhythm of Harry's heartbeat, letting that lull him to sleep.

***

Louis wakes up slowly, a low moan escaping his lips. His entire body is tingling; it feels like every nerve in his body is splitting simultaneously. There's hands tugging at his clothes and—wait a minute, those aren't his hands. Louis' eyes fly open to see Harry still asleep, but his hands are roaming over Louis' body and his lips are pressing open mouthed kisses to Louis' neck. "Shit," Louis curses and disentangles himself from Harry's body, waking Harry in the process.

"Wha—?" Harry groans as Louis crawls away from him. "Lou—?"

"Stay away from me," Louis whimpers, backing into a corner and taking every ounce of his being to stay away.

Harry frowns worriedly. "Louis, what's gotten—?" Then realization dawns on him. "Oh, God, you're in heat. Shit!" Harry throws the sheets off his body, hurrying over to Louis, who tries to push him away, but he seems to have forgotten who he is and who he’s dealing with. Harry pities his strong willed but feeble effort as he himself tries to gather his thoughts before either of them loses control. "Uh, the bathroom door locks," Harry says quickly. "You could wait it out in there." Louis nods, pawing at himself with laborious pants. Harry yanks Louis to his feet, ignoring his instincts, and shoves him into the bathroom before he loses absolute control over himself.

Louis locks the door and slumps against it, breathing heavily. His skin feels like it's on fire and he hasn't even been touched, but he feels like every nerve is over stimulated. Louis struggles with his trousers, his fingers trembling as he tries to pop the button. He struggles out of his clothes, sucking on his fingers to busy himself as he searches desperately for something to help him with his heat, but he finds nothing. Harry is an alpha so of course he wouldn't have anything (besides himself) available to soothe an omega's heat.

"You doing okay in there, Lou?" Harry calls through the door.

"No," Louis gasps as he frantically paws through the cupboard under the sink for something, _anything_ that could help him.

"'m sorry," Harry apologizes unnecessarily. Harry pries himself away from the door; Louis' scent is really powerful and it's taking every ounce of his self control to leave the room and Louis to sweat this out. As he leaves, Harry locks the bedroom door to ensure Louis' safety from Nick. _Speak of the devil_ , Harry thinks as Nick slams into him in the hallway, his eyes dark and wild. "Where is he?" he growls and Harry pushes him away.

"It's none of your business," he hisses.

"It is so," Nick growls. "I can smell him; I need to get in there." He starts for the doorknob, but Harry shoves him away. "Leave him alone," he growls. "He doesn't want—” His voice is cut off when Nick strikes him in the jaw, sending him stumbling backward. Harry is no weak little fly away thing, but the hit surely takes him by surprise. He stares at him, panting heavily as his adrenaline kicks in as Nick smirks victoriously. Harry wants to punch his teeth in. "You're gonna really wish you hadn't done that," he growls lowly and lunges for him, taking him out at the knees. They squabble in the hallway, throwing punches and kicking each other until Liam appears out of nowhere and pulls Harry away. "Knock it off," he scolds, shoving Harry not-so-playfully. "Harry, you can't get involved in this. This is between Louis and Nick."

Harry sets his jaw, wiping at his bloody nose. "It's not fair, Liam," he mutters. "It's not fair that omegas are treated like playthings. Louis is a person, not a fucking piece of meat."

Liam presses his mouth into a thin line. He doesn't know how many times Harry has made complaint of the way omegas are treated. "I know it's not, Harry," he says soothingly, "but that's just the way things are. Let it go." Harry's still breathing heavily, but he nods curtly and pushes past Liam to get away from Nick, whom he's left lying rather pathetically on the floor.

"Don't help him up, Liam," Harry calls behind him and Liam drops his extended hand, shooting Nick an apologetic look and hurries after Harry.

"Harry, you can't just get between them like that," Liam chastises, settling a hand on Harry's shoulder.

Harry grunts, pushing away Liam's hand. "He can't just treat him like that, Liam," he says. "It's completely inhuman."

"Harry, Nick is Louis' alpha and he can do whatever he wants," Liam says softly, holding up a hand as Harry starts to protest. "Louis will be fine, trust me. I don't think Nick would try to really hurt him."

Harry presses his mouth into a line, breaking his eye contact with his friend. "You are so wrong," he mutters. "I'm keeping an eye on both of them. If he so much as touches him when Louis doesn't want it, I'm doing something and there's nothing you can do to stop me."

Liam sighs, shaking his head. "I worry about you sometimes," he says as Harry moves about the kitchen, throwing the fridge door open.

"Yeah?" Harry asks over his shoulder. "Well, I worry about Louis."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i sincerely hope you're enjoying this so far! it's been interesting to write and i'm really excited for it.  
> thank you so much for reading! love you!!!
> 
>  
> 
> [my tumblr](http://dirtshag.tumblr.com/)


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i am aware of how short this chapter is, but due to the amount of time between this scene and the next, i've decided to split them up. i just have to edit the next part a little more, and it'll be up soon after this one, so hold tight! :)
> 
> thank you all for being so patient and such a lovely audience!

Louis' heat lasts about three days and all the alphas are on edge. Harry manages to get into a few more fights with Nick when he finds him lurking outside his bedroom door, but Liam is always there to break them up. The complex literally reeks of the insane amounts of testosterone being produced by all the alphas, specifically Harry and Nick since they're constantly fighting. Meanwhile, Niall and his omega, a nice brunette girl called Amy whom he's really taken to liking quite well, have bonded already. Liam and Zayn have of course already bonded, since they practically were before they were matched. Harry feels somewhat lonely, with all of his friends bonding and he's still waiting for his letter, although now he's getting mixed feelings about it. He's not entirely sure if he wants it to come soon because he's not even sure if he's ready for that kind of commitment. He'd never admit it, but he's terrified of what his match will be. He doesn't think he could put an omega, or _anyone_ , for that matter, through what Louis is being forced into; it seems much too animalistic and Harry would prefer to hold on to his humanity, even if the rest of the world has decided to abandon theirs.

"Liam told me what happened," a freshly showered Louis says as he sits on the sofa next to Harry, jostling him from his thoughts. "You didn't have to do that. Actually, you shouldn't have done that."

Harry sighs, pulling a hand through his hair. "I had to, Louis," he says. "I hate how you omegas are treated. It's so unfair and you guys have no chance of standing up for yourselves so it's just a perpetual cycle and it's bullshit." As Louis sighs, his sweater (it's really Harry's, so it completely swallows the small omega's slight frame) falls down to reveal a fresh bite mark on his shoulder. Harry's heart breaks because Louis is bonded now, and he doesn't look happy. He should be happy. They should all be happy.

Harry doesn't mention the bite and Louis is more quiet than normal as they speak, his shoulders sagging with an invisible but irrefutably existing weight. "Do you think you're going to get your letter soon?" Louis asks and Harry shrugs despondently. "Not even sure if I want it," he says and Louis sucks in a breath. "Don't you want to be happy, Harry?" he asks and Harry rolls his eyes at the complete irony and ridiculousness that it's  _Louis_ who's asked him this. "Are  _you_  happy, Louis?" he asks and the small omega sighs, shaking his head slightly.

"Don't start this, Harry," Louis murmurs. "It's the way things are."

"How can you say that?" Harry asks, throwing his arms out in exasperation. "You can't just sit around and take this shit, Lou."

"I have to, Harry, don't you understand that?" Louis snaps, but it's a broken argument. He sounds more like he's trying to convince himself of the entirety of his situation. "You don't realize what it's like to be an omega, Harry. He could kill me if he really wanted to. Undoubtedly he's capable of doing so."

"I wouldn't let that happen to you," Harry whispers, his voice feeling stuck in his throat.

Louis sighs, wrapping his arms around himself. "You can't keep coming between us, Harry," he whispers. Harry wants to protest, but Louis sighs impatiently and Harry's words die in his throat. "Seriously, Harry. He's violent and has no sense of morals. I wouldn't doubt that he'd kill you if he ever got the chance."

"But if that means keeping you safe, I'd be willing to—"

" _Stop it!_  Can you even hear yourself?" Louis asks. "Just stop, okay? I don't want to talk about this anymore."

"Sorry," Harry mutters and Louis just shakes his head as he gets to his feet. "Just... stay away. Please." Harry's stomach feels like it's lurched into his throat as he watches Louis escape down the hall as the front door opens. Nick saunters in, making himself look more important than he really is.

He regards Harry with a look of contempt. "Where's Louis?" he asks sharply and Harry shrugs. Nick sighs dramatically. "Useless," he mutters and wanders off down the hall after Louis has disappeared, Harry scowling after him the whole way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and if you can't tell, the way omegas are treated is a metaphor for sexism ha. ha. ha... ha.
> 
> the plot is somewhat slow, and i apologize. there will be more action in future chapters, i promise!!
> 
>  
> 
> [my tumblr](http://dirtshag.tumblr.com/)


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you all for being such a lovely audience :)

Harry avoids Louis as best he can for two months. It takes all his self control to stay away because his concern for Louis grows exponentially. All he seems to be wearing anymore are baggy sweaters that swallow him whole. There are dark circles under his eyes and the gauntness of his cheeks is concerning. He doesn't speak very often and when he does, it's very softly. Harry desperately wants to know what's happening to Louis behind closed doors. Obviously it's nothing good, just as he predicted and Harry doesn't know if he wants to punch Nick for doing this or Liam for turning a blind eye to it.

Since the move, Harry got a new job as a writer for an online column. Mainly he writes about the treatment of omegas, but his overseers don't publish any of those, so he's forced to write about sports instead. He hates writing about something as tedious and insignificant as sports, but the bills need to be paid and everyone is expected to contribute. He's busy working on his computer and trying to gather his thoughts when there's a soft knock on the door frame.

"Can I come in?" Louis asks, no louder than a whisper. Harry looks up in surprise; this is the first time in weeks that Louis has initiated conversation with him, and Harry gladly welcomes it. He's hated being shut out of Louis' life and it's even more upsetting since they live in the same building and Louis hasn't so much as smiled at him since their talk.

"Yeah, of course," Harry says, putting his computer aside as Louis slips in, shutting the door behind him. "How are you doing with the whole... thing?"

Louis laughs lightly, but the sound lacks the humor that it should be filled with. "It's going," he says tiredly. "You know, I always get so confused when you ask my opinion," he whispers.

Harry knits his brow. "Why?"

"I guess I was just never taught that I mattered," Louis responds with a shrug.

"Don't say it past tense like that," Harry whispers. "Because this now, and you always have and you always will."

"I just thought that to be a valid person—"

"You are a valid person. You are valid simply because you walk upon this earth," Harry says. Louis closes his eyes with a sigh, wincing slightly. "Lou?" Harry asks, his nerves rising. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Louis mutters. "It's just my stomach." Louis muffles a groan, clutching at his stomach.

"Lou—" Harry starts, springing to his feet.

Louis inhales sharply, folding over himself. He cries out in pain, his eyes widening. "Harry," he gasps, his fingers shaking as they grasp at the fabric of his sweater, "take me to the hospital."

"Louis, what's wrong?" Harry asks frantically.

"Please," Louis pleads. "Just take me to the hospital. I—" Louis cries out in pain again, clutching at his middle and Harry snaps into action, scooping the omega into his arms and running him to the SUV. Harry gently lowers Louis into the backseat before scrambling into the driver's seat and frantically starting the engine. Louis whimpers and cries the whole way there and all Harry can offer him is a few small reassurances.

"You're gonna be okay," Harry says soothingly as he tries not to panic. He's an alpha, damn it. He should be able to keep his head calm in times of chaos, so what's wrong with him?

"It hurts, Harry," Louis whimpers. "Can't you drive any faster?" Harry's already past the speed limit, but this is  _Louis_ , so he presses the pedal further.

Ten minutes of speeding later, Harry carries Louis into the hospital and a nurse in pink scrubs hurries over. "What's wrong with him?" she asks.

"I don't know," Harry says. "He won't tell me, but he needs help." The nurse waves over a few others bearing a wheel chair. Louis whimpers as Harry lowers him into the chair. "Shhh, Lou," Harry soothes. "You're gonna be okay. They're gonna take good care of you."

"I-I'm so scared, Harry," Louis half cries.

"Shhh, Louis," Harry soothes, cupping his face. "You're going to be fine."

"Please, sir," the nurse says. "We need to get him to ER."

"Right, of course," Harry mutters, stepping out of the way as they wheel Louis down the hall, leaving Harry to wait with his thoughts. Harry's head is spinning. He  _promised_  Louis he'd watch out for him and now he's gone and let him down. He paces the waiting room, too full of anxiety and anger to sit down. What could Nick have done to him? Why wasn't he keeping a closer eye on them both? Harry feels like breaking something, but he has to control his anger for the sake of being in a public place, a hospital no less. He paces back and forth, back and forth, as his thoughts settle and he's finally able to see something other than red.

About two hours later, a nurse walks in, glancing at her clipboard. "Mr. Tomlinson?" she asks and Harry gets to his feet.

"It's Styles, actually," he says thickly. "Louis and I aren't married."

"Oh, excuse me," she says, blushing slightly. "I regret to inform you that Louis miscarried. I'm terribly sorry. We did all we could, but—"

"Wait, miscarried as in a  _baby?_ " Harry breathes, his head spinning even faster now.

The nurse looks slightly puzzled. "You didn't know?" she asks. "You couldn't smell it?" She narrows her eyes at him. "You are the father, aren't you?" And when she says that, Harry knows he's made a fatal mistake if he doesn't come up with something. When omegas are pregnant, their scent changes to smell like them, but also like new baby and the scent is incredibly strong during the first few weeks, waning as the pregnancy continues to get more visibly noticeable. Their alphas, being generally more attuned to them than any others, are typically the first to smell it. Harry shakes his head, running his fingers through his hair. The nurse looks slightly alarmed and reaches for the pager on her hip and Harry starts to panic. Only mates are allowed to see those admitted into hospitals. He can't leave Louis on his own like this, so he frantically searches for an excuse. "Yes, yes, I am the father. I, um, have a bad sense of smell," he lies pathetically. "Can I see him?"

"Yes," the nurse says softly, drawing her hand away from her hip. "He's been asking for you, actually." Harry nods, feeling incredibly relieved that she believed him. She doesn't look thoroughly convinced, but beckons for him to follow her down the hall to Louis' room, where he's laid in the bed staring out the window.

"Louis," Harry murmurs and Louis turns his head to look at him as the nurse slips out. "How are you doing?"

"I lost a baby, Harry," he breathes. "Am I a bad person for feeling relieved?"

Harry sits on the edge of the bed, running a hand through Louis' hair. "I dunno, Lou," he murmurs. "Did he know?"

Louis looks down at his interlaced fingers. "Yes, of course he did," he mutters lowly. He's quiet for a moment before he speaks again. "He didn't even bother waking me when he did... this," Louis mutters, gesturing to his stomach, now empty of the life it once held. "I took a test and he was sitting on the bed looking all smug about it when I walked out. It was awful, Harry. I've spent the last month wishing it wasn't real. I don't even think I could have brought that baby into this world with him as its father. At least it was spared from that nightmare." He sighs, swallowing hard as he starts to cry.

"Shhh," Harry soothes. "It's gonna be okay."

"I killed a baby, Harry," Louis whispers. "That's not something I would classify as okay."

"Louis, it's not your fault," Harry says, wrapping the omega in his arms. "It's not your fault; it's just something that happened."

"It happened because I wanted it to, Harry, how selfish is that?" Louis asks, his voice getting softer. Harry pulls him closer to his chest, dropping tiny kisses to the top of his head. "Shhh, Lou," he murmurs. "You were scared and hurt. That probably put a lot of stress on it. It's not your fault."

Louis sniffs, nuzzling further into Harry's chest. "What am I gonna tell him? More important:  _how?_ " he whispers. "He's going to be so mad, Harry."

"I'm sure he'll understand," Harry says softly, though he's not sure of that at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> see i told you there would be action. thank you for reading!!!  
> i'm so happy to see that you guys are enjoying this!!!
> 
> [my tumblr](http://dirtshag.tumblr.com/) if you have any questions or comments, feel free to hit me up there :)


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i really need to start writing in louis' pov again

Louis stays in the hospital for two more days and Harry leaves his bedside only once to return to the complex to get clothes for each of them. When he returns to sit with Louis, he asks the nurse if he's stable enough for additional visitors and she says yes, so Harry phones their friends. Louis' spirits visibly lift as Niall, Liam, and Zayn walk in and Harry is relieved because he hasn't seen Louis' smile in months. No one mentions what's happened, but it's obvious that not one of them is ignoring the way Louis' hands bunch at the sheets over his abdomen. Niall and Zayn joke with him as Liam pulls Harry aside.

"What happened?" he asks quietly, so as not to let Louis hear them. They both know he's in no state to discuss the past few days' events.

"We were talking and he doubled over in pain, telling me to take him to the hospital. They took him to ER and came back two hours later telling me that he miscarried and I just—" Harry sighs, raking a hand through his hair and gathering his thoughts. "I couldn't leave him on his own after something as traumatic as that, so I, um, told them we were mates." Harry can feel his ears turning red as Liam listens. It was a huge mistake to tell the staff that he and Louis were mates. He's probably only made it worse for Louis once Nick finds out what's happened. Harry wonders if he knows already, but he doubts it. Nick is off far away on a business trip, which is probably what made Louis so confident in coming to see him in his room.

Liam doesn't look angry like Harry half expected. He looks tired and sad, two things Harry wasn't expecting. "Harry, I told you not to get involved—"

"I couldn't leave him on his own, Liam," Harry hisses, stealing a glance over at Louis on the bed. "Do you know how scared he looked? He lost something that was part of him, Liam, how frightening is that?"

"Nick isn't going to be very happy about this, Harry," Liam murmurs, shaking his head.

Harry pulls at his hair in frustration. "What do you expect me to say, Liam?" he pleads. "That I caused him to lose it?"

"That's not what I'm asking you to say," Liam says patiently. "I'm just saying that Louis is in no state to—"

"Louis, you have another visitor," a nurse calls as he leads another guest in. The quiet buzz of the room silences gradually, each of them blanching at the figure stood in the middle of the room. Louis looks like he's going to be sick.

"Well?" Nick asks, sweeping his steely gaze about the room. "No one bothered to tell me that he lost the baby?"

"That was not my baby," Louis bitterly mutters under his breath, his fingers clutching at the sheets.

"Shut up!" Nick hisses, raising his hand and Louis flinches.

"Don't talk to him like that," Harry demands, balling up his fists.

Nick turns his attention to Harry, narrowing his eyes at him. "You," he growls, pointing a threatening finger in Harry's direction. "Don't even get me started on you. What gives you the right to claim him as yours?"

"At least I've been here for him," Harry seethes.

"Harry," Liam warns lowly, settling a hand on Harry's shoulder, but Harry brushes him off.

"He's your fucking mate," Harry explodes. "You don't treat him properly. You scare him near to death on a daily basis. No wonder he lost it." Louis is crying now, and Zayn swoops in to comfort the poor omega.

Nick sets his jaw. "Why are you so interested in him anyway?"

"Because he's my friend," Harry nearly shouts. "I look out for my friends." He pauses, his breathing heavy as his fighting instinct struggles for control. "You don't deserve him. You two should have never been matched."

"Oi, mate," Niall calls warningly. He's worked in the facility on the other side of the city for years and is now in a very high position. Although it’s not surprising how fast he climbed the cooperate ladder, considering the fact that he’s an alpha. "Don't say stuff like that." Harry can't believe that Niall condones this, but he can't allow himself to get any angrier lest he lose absolute control of himself. "Fine," he grumbles and throws himself into the chair next to Louis' bed. Nick stares icily at him and Harry stares back just as coolly.

"You've got a lot of nerve," Nick says coolly. "Too much for your own good." He pauses, fiddling with his watch and pulling at his tie as he clears his throat. "When is he getting out?"

"Tomorrow," Liam offers quickly and quietly.

Nick sighs, glancing at his watch. "All right," he says, uncharacteristically softly. Harry wants to punch his face in. Surely he's acting as if he truly cares for Louis' safety, acting as if he's not in the wrong. "All of you leave. I'll stay with him tonight."

"No way!" Harry protests, springing to his feet. Liam lunges forward, gripping at Harry's arm. "Harry, leave it," he hisses in his ear. Harry is furious, but the digging of Liam's fingers in his arm tells him he should let it go. "Fine," he grumbles. "Feel better, Louis." He storms out of the room with Liam, Zayn, and Niall hurrying after him, and they all leave Louis alone with Nick.

"What the fuck was that back there, Niall?" Harry asks, turning on Niall, who throws up his hands in defense. "That was my job you were talking about," he says, then lowers his voice, glancing upward. "Harry, there are cameras everywhere. You can't just say stuff like that so freely."

Harry pulls a hand through his hair, heaving a heavy sigh. “I’m sorry,” he mutters. “I just can’t control myself when it comes to Louis. He’s not safe with him.” Zayn and Liam share a look and Niall just looks down at the floor, shuffling his shoes along the scuff marks littering the dull, worn speckled tile.

“We know you’re just looking out for him, Harry,” Zayn says softly.

“But don’t you think this is a little, oh, I don’t know, um, obsessive?” Liam asks quietly, not looking him in the eyes like he always does.

“He’s my friend. He’s all our friend,” Harry says, feeling like he’s been backed into a corner. He’s panicking, and alphas don’t panic.  _What’s_ wrong _with him?_  “Don’t you guys worry about him?”

“Course we do,” Niall says quickly. “But we’ve got our own lives to live, Harry. So does Louis, and that’s with Nick.”

Harry feels his eyes prickle with tears and he blinks the hot pain of them back furiously. He hasn’t cried in years. He hasn’t cried since he was a child.  _Alphas don’t cry,_  he reminds himself as he scrubs at his eyelids with what he hopes is subtlety.

“Listen, Harry,” Liam says gently. “It’s obvious that you care about Louis. We all do, don’t think we don’t, but you really need to stop coming between him and Nick. It’s not right.”

“Not right?” Harry asks incredulously. “What’s not right is the way they  _breed_  us, like we’re animals.”

“Oi!” Niall hisses. “Keep your voice down, you wanker. They’ll hear you.”

“Don’t you see?” Harry whispers, his eyes ghosting across the ceiling tiles. “We’re just an experiment to them.” Niall opens and closes his mouth, looking for words to say, something to defend the audacity of the government, but he’s left with nothing. “That’s what I thought,” Harry mutters and turns on his heel to storm off down the hallway, leaving his friends to stare after him helplessly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm sorry this is so short, but thank you so much for reading!!!
> 
>  
> 
> [my tumblr](http://dirtshag.tumblr.com/)


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> abuse and rape trigger warning, stay safe xx

Louis barely sleeps. He can't even fathom the idea of it with the weight of Nick's heavy gaze on his back. He tugs the crisp hospital sheets closer to his body as if they'll give him any protection.

"I don't blame you, Louis," Nick says quietly. Louis doesn't believe him. It was his fault, everything is his fault. He can hear Nick sigh, the chair wheezing as he shifts and Louis tries to block out everything but his thoughts. The baby would have lived if he hadn't rejected Nick's bite. It pierced the area between his neck and shoulder, but not enough to draw blood and that's what completes the bond. Really, they're only half bonded. Omegas are built for carrying children, however dangerous it may be, and they have a higher chance of carrying full term when they're fully bonded, so it truly is his fault they lost it. He doesn't even know he's crying until there's a damp, salty circle on his pillow. He didn't even know he wanted it that badly, but it's what he was built for so even though his extrinsic self didn't want it, his internal instincts worked their way into his behavior, trying desperately to keep the baby alive, even to the point at the cost of his own life. The tears start again as he remembers the day he found out.

_Louis feels the tears prickling at the backs of his eyes as he looks down at the little white stick, the two lines glaring back up at him mockingly. Louis wants to cry and kick and scream but he can't bring himself to do so; all he feels is an overpowering numbness folding down throughout his limbs. He's pregnant and hates the father with a burning type of passion that he's felt only once before, and it's painful, but even that's not enough to expel the numbness taking over him. His life is over, and he knows it. This baby will kill him; it'll drain what little energy he'll be able to muster and he's going to be so hugely round and disgusting looking. He doesn't even want to think about the birth. He's incredibly small, and a healthy sized baby is at least seven pounds; it'll tear him in half. He sits on the tub, wrapping his arms around himself and not at all wishing someone else was holding him. He can't do this. He can't bring a baby into the world this way. He had always wanted kids, it's everything his body was made to do, but he never wanted it this way. He was supposed to bond with an alpha he loved, but he's sitting on the tub carrying the baby of a man that didn't even bother to wake him before slapping himself in while he slept. He hates that he's feeling this way; it goes against everything he was made to do, and it hurts like nothing he's ever felt before. Louis collects himself as best he can, tossing the stick in the trash before stepping out of the bathroom. Nick's sitting on the bed, watching him closely and looking smug as Louis walks over._

_"You're a fucking prick, you know that?" he spits and Nick just laughs. "Oh, shut up," he says, an evilly joyful light flickering in his eyes. "This is all you were ever meant to do."_

_"Fuck you," Louis spits before walking stiffly out the door, bursting into fresh tears once he's in the hallway and no one is around to comfort him. Only the walls watch, keeping their everlasting silence. Louis has never felt more alone in his life._

Louis sighs inaudibly, trembling at the hellish memory. He stares blankly at the wall just as blank as his stare as he hears Nick shift again. The hospital chairs are as comfortable as the beds.

"Louis, I really don't blame you," Nick murmurs.

"No, you're right," Louis mutters scathingly. "This is all  _your_  fault. You're the one who did this to me."

Nick lets out a long sigh. "You're the one who resisted my bite."

"Because I was scared," Louis defends, turning over to face the blank faced alpha. "Why didn't you just work for my trust? It's not that hard to gain."

"It would've taken too long," Nick mutters. "Louis, my biological clock is ticking. You're at the ripest age to carry a child. I had to take my chance when I could."

"I was  _asleep_ ," Louis protests weakly. "You couldn't even have asked me, or even  _woken_  me?"

Nick breaks eye contact as if it hurts to look Louis in the eye, which Louis supposes it does, but Nick is not one to harbor feelings of guilt. "You know what," he says levelly after a while. "This is your fault. If you hadn't been so stubborn—" Nick breaks off, realization filling his eyes. "No," he says. "It's not that. It's that other alpha, Harry, isn't it?"

"What?" Louis breathes, taken aback completely.

"You're quite close with him," Nick says lowly. "Have you mated with him?" He narrows his eyes at Louis. "I'm always smelling him on you."

"What? No!" Louis defends. "Harry's just a friend. They're all a little overprotective of me."

"Well, that's not their job anymore, is it?" Nick asks coolly and Louis seethes. "You're doing a helluva job with it so far," he spits. Nick narrows his gaze (Louis didn't think it could get any narrower than it had before) and his voice is terrifyingly soft when he speaks. "Then I guess I'll quit," he says and Louis quakes in the sheets as Nick gets to his feet. "No," he pleads. "I didn't mean it.  _Please._ "

***

Louis returns to the complex with a bruise forming under his eye and a gash over his brow. Nick tells everyone that he got them as he got into the car ("You know how clumsy he is."), but it's obvious that no one is buying into that bullshit, especially Harry, who glares at Nick over his cereal. Louis looks down at the floor. Everything is too much to handle right now; Louis feels like he's drowning, but he's standing on solid ground. "I think I'm going to lie down," he whispers and scurries off down the hall, knowing that every pair of eyes is following him. He burrows deep into the sheets, not feeling relieved at the smell of them at all; all they smell like is Nick, and Louis wants to cry, but he's cried so much the past few days that there's nothing left for him to cry out. He doesn't know how long he lies there for, but eventually the door creaks open and Zayn's slender form stands in the doorway.

"Louis," he says softly.

"I don't want to talk," Louis replies flatly as Zayn makes his way over. "We don't have to," he murmurs, sitting on the mattress next to his friend.

"I can smell it," Louis murmurs and Zayn stiffens. "I'm sorry," he whispers. "Liam sent me in. I couldn't not listen to him."

Louis sighs. "I know," he whispers brokenly, rolling to his back to stare up at the ceiling, blinking back hot tears. "He didn't really think that through, did he?"

"No, I suppose not," Zayn says thoughtfully. "He's just concerned about you, Lou. We all are."

"I know you are," Louis sighs, "but I think being around you might... trigger something."

"I understand," Zayn says softly, getting to his feet. "Liam doesn't understand these kinds of things, Louis. He's not trying to hurt you."

"I know," Louis whispers. It seems like that's all he can say. It feels and sounds robotic. 

Zayn clears his throat. “You know, the doctors said this is all part of the recovery process,” he says. "It's okay to feel sad. You should talk to us, let it out."

“I’m not ready for that just yet,” Louis whispers. “I need some time to myself for a while.”

“Louis, the doctors said that—”

“I lost a baby, Zayn,” Louis hisses through his clenched teeth. He'll feel guilty for as long as he lives, even if he never wanted it in the first place. His body is just wired that way; all omegas are. “Please. Just let me be.”

Zayn sighs in defeat, rubbing his hands over his face.

"We love you, Louis."

"I know. I love you guys, too."

Zayn lingers in the doorway, hesitant of leaving Louis on his own. Louis figures Liam gave him specific instructions to not leave him on his own, but right now, that's all he wants. It's better that way. The door closes with a soft  _click_  and Louis falls to pieces. Why do Zayn and Liam get to be happy? Why are they so much luckier than he is? They were so close before they were even miraculously matched. Louis would say they were soul mates if such things existed, and now they're having a baby of their own. Zayn's a beta, one bigger than average, so he'll have no trouble carrying it, unlike Louis, whose stature is short and rather stout, but slight nonetheless. This is when Louis starts to cry again, burying his face into the pillow and clutching it like it's the only thing he has in the world, and perhaps it is.

***

Recovery is a long and painful process. Louis spends the first two weeks in bed every day, with someone being sent in to feed him, but he doesn't eat what they leave for him. He's not felt hungry at all. He feels nothing but numbness encroaching on his insides, squeezing every other feeling out of him. Zayn is sent in only when they think he's asleep, but Louis can't sleep anymore: the nightmares are much too terrifying and each time Zayn scurries in, his scent causes another wave of sadness to crash over Louis' already fragile emotional state.

The first time Louis steps out of the little nest he's made for himself in his bedroom, everyone stops and stares at him like an animal in a zoo, which Louis supposes he resembles in a not so slight way. He doesn't speak, he just gives a quick nod before he grabs a glass for water and scurries back into the safety of his room, where their eyes can't find him. He especially can't handle the weight of Harry's gaze on him; it's not pitying, but it's this sort of hopeless longing and Louis bursts into tears before he's even slipped under the sheets again.

Louis feels like he's gluing two parts of himself together that never were truly parts of him, and the glue isn't sticking. He feels like there's this raggedy crack splitting through him and it comes in the form of headaches nearly every day, peeling apart the pieces of him he's trying so desperately to put together. He bites at the scabbed part of his lips, healing from the many times he's bitten them raw the past few weeks and he feels as if it's a metaphor for how he may never get better, like each time he feels something other than this looming sadness, it comes along and blocks it off, scabbing over it and preventing him from truly healing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you so much for reading! are you enjoying it so far?  
> i promise it will get happier in the next chapter :)  
> i am so happy to write in louis' pov again (not that i don't like harry's pov; i just prefer louis')
> 
>  
> 
> [my tumblr](http://dirtshag.tumblr.com/)


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  _'just keep following_  
>  _the heartlines on your hand._  
>  _keep it up, i know you can.'_  
> [listen](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=waiB8mWOJOA)  
>  or [listen](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tfBY96qxVRQ)  
> here's where we get to the smut and i would just like to apologize to my ten year old self, who grew up never imagining that she would be writing so much homo

Louis does get better, though, within the course of a few months. The pain has faded significantly, but he still feels sad some days. Those days are spent alone in his bedroom, his heavy heart enjoying the solitude he's wanted for so long. He's no longer  _all_  his friends' top priority, which is somewhat disheartening since deep down he enjoyed being fussed over, but now he's got free reign of his own life, apart from Nick's demands. Things around the complex have settled down, well as much as they can with two alphas constantly glaring daggers at each other, and another severely overprotective and admittedly  _fluffy_  father-to-be and said alpha's beta extremely moody and not to mention kind of horny, which can sometimes get a little disturbing to see first thing in the morning.

Since Liam has devoted all his protective nature toward Zayn, Louis has been free of his doting for the first time in years. He doesn't get scolded when he goes out by himself, not that he goes out alone often anyway. He wants to be dangerous, he decides one night when he stumbles across an old leather jacket that had been buried in his closet since who knows when. Louis doesn't know why he's feeling so bold all of a sudden. Maybe he's tired of being so submissive all the time and now he's finally taking charge for once. Or maybe he just really, really needs to get wasted. Yeah, that's it. He knows Liam won't take him and Zayn can't. Niall and Nick are both working late tonight, (not that he'd ask Nick to take him drinking; he may be dense but he's not completely stupid) so he goes to the only person he knows will help him. He barges into the room, Harry yelping and muttering curses under his breath as he hurriedly shuts his laptop lid. "Christ, Lou," he gasps. "Would you mind knocking?"

"Sorry," Louis says sheepishly, looking away as Harry pulls on fresh pants, his moment of feeling dominant for once fleeting quite pitifully. "I want to get fucking wasted."

Harry furrows his brows at him. "Why?" he asks.

"Too many thoughts," Louis mumbles, tapping his temple.

"What do you need me for?" Harry asks, eyeing him suspiciously.

"Well I'm not going to go alone, am I?" Louis asks. He hasn't gone out by himself since the day he received his letter (a.k.a. the day his life started epically sucking).

Harry nods decisively. "Yeah, you're right," he says thoughtfully, grabbing his keys.

***

"And—hic—according to legend, we all have a soul mate," Harry says, sounding as sticky as the bar they're sat at. There's the normal hum of incoherent murmuring from other patrons, but Louis is fixated solely on Harry, no matter how increasingly ridiculous he sounds. The smoky haze of the bar clouds at the edges of his mind, but Harry is in clear focus.

"Really?" Louis asks. He hasn't had nearly as much to drink as Harry, but it doesn't take much to get him drunk. Harry could drink half a barrel and not feel the slightest bit intoxicated. Louis is lucky if he can down five shots and remain sober.

Harry nods earnestly. "Apparently people used to read the lines on their palms to see their futures. Legend has it that if your heart line matches up with someone else's, you're soul mates."

"Really?" Louis asks again, fully unamused.

"Wanna try?" Harry asks, wiggling his brows at him and Louis snorts. "You and me?" he asks. "Potential soul mates. I don't think so. Soul mates aren't even a thing. They're just an urban legend, Harry. They're something people have made up so they're not so sore about their matches."

"C'mon, Lou, just give it a try," Harry pushes. "It's all in good fun, yeah?"

The alcohol is definitely clouding his judgment. "Yeah, okay," he says just to humor Harry, sticking out his hand. "Put 'er there." Harry's hand is enormous compared to his, but then again, Harry is larger than him in every aspect.

"Um, Lou?" Harry says uncertainly, his brows knitting. "Do you feel stinging?"

"Yeah," Louis breathes. He tries to pull his hand away, but it's almost as if they're fused together. "Harry, what's happening?" he panics.

"Don't know," Harry grunts as he tries to pry them apart. The stinging intensifies, both of them grimacing until suddenly, it stops and their hands fall apart from each other. "The hell?" Harry asks, squinting at his hand. "Louis, look at your hand."

The most prominent line across his palm looks like it's been burned an angry red. He glances at Harry's, which looks the same. When he looks back at his, it's already fading back to normal. "What does it mean?" he whispers, watching until it disappears.

"I think it means we're soul mates," Harry murmurs. "Look, they're the same."

"No," Louis breathes. "No, we can't be. They don't even exist, Harry."

"No, this explains everything," Harry says quickly, some sort of realization dawning on his placid features. "This explains why I can't keep calm when something bad happens to you. This explains why I'm so protective over you. Normally that sort of stuff would fade after you were bonded to another alpha. Louis... we're soul mates." Harry's voice is soft, his eyes bright, and his smile the fondest Louis has ever seen.

"No," Louis whines, covering his face. "I've had enough of alphas."

"Louis, do you think I would ever hurt you?" Harry asks softly, his fingers no longer hesitant to touch him as they have been since their world was flipped upside down.

"No," Louis mumbles a bit shamefully.

"Do you trust me?" Harry asks and Louis nods. "Wholeheartedly."

Harry smiles as he leans in, ghosting his lips against the sensitive skin of Louis' neck. "Then show me."

 

Louis feels that tingling sensation again all the way on the drive back to the complex. He hasn't felt it since that first morning in the complex, when he woke up beside Harry mid-heat. Harry's free hand runs up and down his thigh the whole way back and Louis is already quaking in anticipation. There's this unmistakable rush of emotion flooding his chest, filling up all his empty spaces with an insurmountable amount of _want_  that he's never felt before. Harry seems to pick up on it, his pupils dilating when he glances at Louis. There's a guttural noise bubbling in his throat that Louis can't stop and it escapes through his mouth in a low pitched moan.

Harry glances at him, his brows rising. "Shit, Lou," he exclaims, chuckling softly.

"I-I, um," Louis falters. "I didn't mean to."

"No, it was hot," Harry breathes, his grip on the steering wheel tightening. "Fuck, Lou. I want you so bad."

"But what about everyone else?" Louis asks, suddenly hyper aware of what they're about to do.

Harry furrows his brows. "Shit, you're right," he mumbles with a sigh. "Maybe we could go back to the old flat; I think I left some spare sheets and a few clothes in my closet. I still have a key...."

"Won't someone be living there?" Louis asks.

Harry shakes his head. "No one's gonna want to live in a flat that was occupied by three alphas and a beta that might as well be an alpha, Louis."

"Right," Louis mutters, his face reddening.

"You're so pretty when you're all red like that," Harry teases and Louis rolls his eyes, turning an even deeper red.

When Harry pulls into the driveway, he barely leaves time to kill the engine before bounding out and thrusting open Louis' door, forcibly lifting him out of his seat. Louis yelps at this, nuzzling his face into Harry's neck as he chuckles softly, carrying the small omega through the front door bridal style. Louis hums as he presses tiny kisses to Harry's strong neck, his lips ghosting over his collar bones, and Harry's breath hitches, his jeans getting almost unbearably tight.

"You're so fucking hot," Harry mumbles, leaning down to press open mouthed kisses to Louis' neck, making him gasp and whine.

"Want you," he pants, his fingers clutching at the fabric of Harry's shirt.

"Need you," Harry mutters, roughly shoving the material of Louis' shirt to the side and nipping at his shoulder. He's holding him up against the wall, Louis' hands fisting his hair rather roughly, but Harry likes the feel of Louis' small hands gripping at the nape of his neck. Harry grinds against him, eliciting a sharp gasp from Louis' lips.

"Harry," he gasps. "We can't."

"Course we can," Harry murmurs, his hand slipping under Louis' shirt.

"No, we can't," Louis mumbles into his shoulder. "Nick's gonna smell you all over me—" He's cut off by his own gasp and he knows exactly what Harry's trying to do.

"Don't have to worry about Nick anymore," Harry mumbles into the wet kisses he plants over Louis' collar bones. "Gonna mark you. Make you mine." He sucks at Louis' neck, leaving a sizable bruise, the angry red-purple color contrasting beautifully with Louis' softly tanned skin. Harry smirks in spite of himself, running a thumb over it before lapping at it to soothe the rawness of it. "All mine."

"Harry," Louis squeaks.

"Shhh, shhh, shhh," Harry shushes, planting a kiss on Louis' pretty mouth and pressing their foreheads together, looking Louis in the eyes with as much sincerity as he can muster. "Trust me. Okay?"

"Okay," Louis breathes.

Harry strokes Louis' thigh lightly. "I don't want to hurt you, or make you feel like you have to do this. If you feel uncomfortable or—or you want to stop, just let me know, and we'll stop. I promise you."

"Okay," Louis whispers with a small nod as Harry presses a soft kiss to his lips. Louis full well knows that he isn't a virgin, but the last time he was with an alpha, he wasn't even fucking awake.

"Shhh," Harry murmurs. "I know what you're thinking about. 'm not gonna do that to you. Wanna make sure you feel everything. Wanna make you feel real good." Harry works them both into his room, his fingers working at ridding Louis' shirt from his body, easing him onto the bed. Louis crosses his arms against his naked torso; there's a hideous, thin, spidery scar that stretches between his hips from his surgery when the doctors removed the deceased fetus. He doesn't like to look at it, for it brings back so many bad memories. Harry gently pries away his arms, nothing but love in his eyes. "Don't cover yourself up," he murmurs.

"It's ugly, Harry," Louis whispers.

"It's not ugly, Lou," Harry mumbles. "You are so beautiful. Every bit of you." He emphasizes this by pressing small kisses along the length of Louis' scar.

"Harry, please," Louis whispers. "Don't."

Harry peers up at him through his lashes. "Okay," he whispers and plants a trail of wet kisses up the rest of Louis' torso, ending with his mouth. Louis tries his hardest to relax, but he just can't seem to open himself up. He supposes that it's just muscle memory from the last time Nick touched him, though Louis will never consider that his first sexual encounter. The few times he's been sexual with someone, it's been uncomfortable and forced, with Louis wishing it was over before it even began. He's been fucked, but he's never been made love to. This right here with Harry is his moment of deflowering.

"I trust you," Louis whispers when Harry's fingers linger near the waistband of his boxers. Harry nods, pressing his lips against his as he works Louis' jeans off. Louis can't stop himself, his fingers trembling as they skirt along the hemline of Harry's shirt. "Can I?" he asks, biting his lip. "Is it okay?"

Harry chuckles softly into Louis' neck. "It's fine, Louis," he murmurs, nipping at the skin. "You don't have to ask permission to do anything. That's my job. I'm gonna try really hard to ask your permission before I do anything. And I apologize in advance if I forget to." Louis nods slowly, yanking Harry's shirt up over his head, his eyes widening at the definition of Harry's torso. "Like it?" Harry asks smugly and Louis nods, running his fingers across Harry's chest.

"When did you get all these tattoos?" he whispers as he traces the laurels inked into the alpha's hips. "I guess I've never asked."

"I got a lot of them before you moved into our little flat," Harry mumbles. "Liam was so mad when I came home with the first one, but then he ended up getting a few himself, so...."

"Do you think that I would look good with a few?" Louis asks as Harry leaves another love bite on his neck.

"You're hot as you are now," Harry mumbles between love bites, "but it's your body, baby." Harry sucks at the space where Louis' neck meets his jaw and Louis just about melts, whimpering as his hips buck. Harry breaks away sloppily in surprise as Louis tugs at the waistband of his jeans. "Get them off," he whines and Harry happily obliges, shoving off his pants as well. Louis nearly chokes on his own breath at his size and Harry smirks, easing Louis' boxers down his legs. "Shhh," he soothes, pressing a kiss to Louis' hip. "Soon, baby."

He gently rolls Louis to his stomach, pressing a string of wet kisses down the back of his neck soothingly as he presses one finger into his slick, puckered hole, eliciting a moan from the omega. "Good boy," Harry murmurs as he starts to pump his finger. Louis wriggles in discomfort, whimpering a little in the newness of actual intimacy. "Shhh," Harry shushes as he presses in a second finger, getting a sharp gasp out of Louis that goes straight to his dick. "Gotta stretch you out, babe." Louis whimpers as he nods in understanding, pressing his face into the mattress to stifle his moans and whimpers as Harry's fingers curl. "You're doing so well, baby," Harry praises as he pushes in a third and final finger. Louis yelps, shuddering as Harry pumps them quickly. Harry leans forward, peppering Louis' shoulders with kisses when Louis gasps, nearly choking on his own breath. "There, Harry," he pants. " _Please._ " Harry nods, pressing deeper until the tips of his fingers brush against Louis' prostate and Louis nearly falls to pieces, quaking and muttering curse words under his breath. Some thought about Louis swearing pricks at the back of his mind, but Harry can't clear his head enough to see it. He feels it's something important, but Louis is lying beneath him a quivering hot mess and all thoughts turn to his painfully hard dick.

"Ready baby?" Harry rasps and Louis nods into the mattress, gasping as Harry grasps one of his ass cheeks, squeezing gently as he lines himself up to his hole. Louis gasps as the tip brushes against him and Harry strokes a hand up his side soothingly. "Okay, baby?"

"No," Louis gasps into the mattress.

"Do you want me to stop?" Harry asks, pushing himself up on his elbows.

"No," Louis cries, unsticking his face from the mattress.

"Are you sure?" Harry asks. Louis nods vigorously. "Yes," he gasps. Harry chokes because, shit, he hasn't even properly penetrated him and Louis is all spread for him, shaking violently in the mere anticipation of it. He presses himself down, pushing in slowly and watching as Louis shudders at the sensation.

"It hurts, Harry," Louis cries as Harry presses a kiss to the nape of his neck. "I know it does, baby," he murmurs, snaking an arm around Louis' front, pulling them both upward as he settles back on his folded legs. Louis gasps at the sudden stretch and full feeling, easing himself down onto Harry, taking him in further. Harry presses kisses to his shoulders, murmuring little praises against Louis' hot skin as he thrusts up into him, whimpers falling from Louis' pretty mouth. Harry runs his fingers up and down Louis' sides soothingly as Louis throws his head back against his shoulder, coming white and hot. 

Harry sponges soft kisses to Louis' shoulders and feels the tug in his stomach, his thigh muscles locking up and he knows he's going to knot soon. "Louis, baby, I'm gonna knot soon," he rasps. "Do you want it?" Louis nods smally against his shoulder. "Just hang on, love," Harry whispers. "It may hurt a bit." Harry swears when it pops, Louis yelping and crying as Harry bites down on the space between his neck and shoulder, drawing blood. Louis screws his eyes shut as Harry fills him with a copious amount of come, his stomach being pushed out from the combined force and amount of it and Harry's agonizingly painful size. He feels so stretched and full and completely high with the overwhelming sensations he's forcing his body to withstand, it's ridiculous. "It's almost over, baby," Harry soothes, stroking his hands up and down Louis' sides, pressing kisses to his neck and the space between his shoulder as they wait for his knot to go down. Harry gently swipes away the tears streaming silently down his lover's cheeks, cradling his fragile blissed-out body carefully.

Louis is asleep by the time it goes down so Harry pulls out as gingerly as he can so as not to wake his little lover. He cleans both of them up, working a fresh pair of boxers and one of his sweaters onto Louis before slipping into his own fresh pair. He carries Louis to the sofa before he strips the bed of its ruined sheets and replaces them with fresh ones. He retrieves Louis from the sofa, accidentally waking him, but Louis just nuzzles his nose into Harry's chest as he carries him into the room, too full of semen and pleasure to care.

"Love you," he mumbles sleepily and Harry smiles as he gently lowers Louis into the sheets, tugging them up to his chest.

"Love you, too," he whispers as he crawls in next to Louis, cuddling him close.

***

Louis wakes up to the sight of his stomach so distended with come, he looks almost pregnant. He sighs, rubbing his thumb over the soft curve of it. Harry rolls over to face him, his smile fading when he sees how upset his omega is. "What is it?" he asks, his voice laced with concern. "Are you regretting last night?"

"No, never. It's just that 'm all full of your come," Louis says with a pout. "I look pregnant."

Harry hums happily, rubbing circles into his lover's stomach. "Bet you'd look real good like that, all round and full of my baby."

Louis looks up at him, biting his lip. "Would you want that?" he asks quietly.

"Course I would," Harry says, pressing a kiss to Louis' forehead. "But only when you're ready for that, babe. I'm not going to rush you into anything you don't want."

"I could very well be pregnant right now," Louis murmurs, patting his stomach rather fondly. "This is a lot of semen."

"I know," Harry mumbles, kissing the tip of Louis' nose. "It'll all go away in a few days. For now, though, I'm going to imagine how amazing you're going to look with my baby in there." He pauses uneasily, suddenly reminded of the events from a few months ago. "That is, if you're ready for a baby."

Louis smiles fondly. "I only want a baby if it's ours."

Harry smiles, pressing a kiss to his lips. "Good," he mumbles, slipping his hand under Louis' (his) sweater and pressing against the warm tautness of his stomach. "'cause we might be getting that very, very soon."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so i guess the smut wasn't really as vague as i had originally intended. oops.  
> (i haven't written smut this detailed in a long time, let alone slash. how did i do????)
> 
>  
> 
> [my tumblr](http://dirtshag.tumblr.com/)


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm sorry this is so short! i promise the next chapter will be up tomorrow! :)
> 
> thank you all for your wonderful comments and eagerness! :)

"Nick's left for his business trip by now," Louis murmurs, his fingers fiddling with his seat belt.

"Everyone should be at work at this time," Harry says as he pulls the SUV into the driveway and kills the engine, "so we should be okay. Hopefully the scent fades by the time everyone gets back later."

"No kidding," Louis breathes. The love bites on his neck have already faded and Louis is relieved but also kind of sad to see them go so soon. Omegas heal faster than alphas and betas, though each group heals insanely quickly. "I still can't believe we did that."

"I know," Harry mumbles.

"We're breaking so many rules."

"I know."

"It feels kinda good, though, yeah?" Louis asks, his eyes shining. "Kinda like that 'star-crossed lovers' shit."

"It feels amazing," Harry murmurs, leaning over to press a kiss to Louis' forehead. "And don't dis Shakespeare." Louis sticks out his tongue and Harry just rolls his eyes fondly. The amount of love he has for this omega is really quite ridiculous.

They nestle themselves on the sofa with a movie marathon for the remainder of the day, just wrapped up in each other and huddled under the same blanket, with Harry pressing chaste kisses to the side of Louis' head in the sleepy tranquility. When the sound of Liam's vehicle rolls into earshot, they reluctantly drift apart, trying to look as platonic as possible.

"So you two are finally home," Liam comments, his brows raised expectantly. "Where were you last night?"

"The bar was really crowded," Harry says. "You wouldn't believe how busy they were."

Louis nods earnestly as Liam regards them skeptically. "That didn't answer my question," he says, already sounding like a disappointed father and quite resembling one.

Harry rolls his eyes. "We got home at ten this morning," he says. "We were too drunk to drive home, so we spent the night at one of Louis' old friend's house."

"Did you?" Liam asks, obviously unconvinced. "Louis, tell me the truth."

Louis doesn't hesitate with his answer like Harry half expected. As an omega, he's supposed to do as all alphas say. "'s true," he says. "Totally wasted. Kicked it at Stan's."

Liam frowns slightly. "Fine," he says. "I believe you. Just don't stay out so late again. You guys had us worried."

Harry chuckles lowly. "He was with me, Liam," he says. "It's not like he was out on his own. I'm fully capable of protecting him."

"We weren't worried about that," Liam says pointedly. "You know how close he is to his heat. I think we all know how close the two of you are."

Harry snorts. "Please, Liam," he says. "Louis is, like, my little brother." Liam still doesn't look convinced and Louis wrinkles his nose at Harry's suggestion that they're close to siblings. Harry's face drops as Liam disappears down the hall. "I think he knows," he whispers, rubbing his hands over his face.

Louis shakes his head. "No, I don't think he does," he says. "You're reading too much into it. I think he was just  _implying_  that something might have happened. It means he has his suspicions, so we need to be careful." Louis glances over his shoulder down the hall, lowering his voice. "I don't think he would hesitate to report us. You know how he's a stickler to the rules."

"I know," Harry mutters. "We'll just have to stay under the radar, yeah?"

***

_ The New London Genetics Research and Regulatory Facility, 4:41 pm _

"Do you see this?" the head of his department asks, looking severe as he walks in. Niall was paged to his super's office without warning, but now he sees the reason and his heart nearly stops. Her office room shades are pulled, the only light coming from the large holographic video capture in the middle of the room.

"Yes ma'am," Niall says placidly. He can't say he didn't see this coming.

"Fix it. We can't allow another outbreak," she orders, her hard eyes never leaving the scene unfolding. "The last thing we need is people realizing that they can break their bonds, or that urban legend garbage however true it may be."

"Yes, ma'am," Niall replies with a curt nod.

"I expected you of all people to have a better handle on this, Horan," she says stiffly, straightening her badge. Niall remains silent, standing at attention. "I want you to move your things into your old office; it's still empty. When you fix this  _issue_ ,you can return to your position."

"Yes ma'am."

Niall's heart pounds in his chest as he moves back into his old office. Harry and Louis will be at the epicenter of disaster if he doesn't warn them. He really doesn't want to tear them apart, because even he will admit that they're as close to soul mates as anyone is ever going to get. He needs to warn them, or else history will repeat itself for the umpteenth time.

It started when people first developed their omegaverse characteristics, a side effect of the nuclear radiation from the Last Great War, which incidentally, is not the last war to ever be fought as it had been intended to be. They're in the middle of a war right now, except not one of the citizens realizes it. Admittedly, a small handful knows, but the facility has a solution to that. Niall doesn't condone the practice, but order must be kept under all circumstances. He fears that if he doesn't warn his friends, everything will explode and the facility will be forced to deploy Phase Five, which will utterly destroy their world as they know it. A gas that affects the memory will release from every drain and citizens will  _temporarily_  forget everything they know. The facility typically uses this gas in small amounts on the poor souls who have stumbled across the inconvenient truth, but if word of bond breaking spreads, it will have no choice but to release the gas on the entire city.

The facility has done this twice within the eighty years it's been standing and some of Niall's older co-workers are the only people who remember what life was like before it, since government workers are granted immunity against the gas through an immunization a week before the gas is scheduled to release. "It's awful," one of the older women mutters over her coffee when the topic arose one day during break. "People forget everything, who they are,  _what_  they are, for about a week. They just stumble around, this hollow, lost look in their eyes." She shakes her head gravely as the younger employees listen on with horrified disgust written into their features. "It takes a while for the facility to process each individual's information before it's reinstalled into their memory via the microchip that everyone's implanted with at birth." She sighs, brushing away a few stray hairs. "It's like those 'resets' from old video games from years ago. It's a lot of work for us, and completely unethical. You haven't seen loss until you watch a young child wander past its own mother, neither of them aware of who the other is, or rather  _was_. But it's necessary if we want to keep the public safe from themselves."

Niall closes his eyes with a tired sigh, faced with an impossibly huge decision to make between his friends and the fate of the entire city.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading! you got a little taste of what's at stake besides nick's outrage. the next chapter will be longer, i promise!
> 
>  
> 
> [my tumblr](http://dirtshag.tumblr.com/)


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i was listening to name by goo goo dolls while writing this and got emotions
> 
> sexual abuse and manipulation trigger warning stay safe xx

Niall delays in warning his friends for about three days. He's been struggling with how to break it to them without feeling so very intrusive. Plus, he's choosing his friends over the safety of the entire city. His job, the safety of his friends and family, and the lives of an entire city rest in his hands, and he's choosing his two of his friends over all of that. He really won't get enough recognition for this. "Harry, could I talk to you?" he asks finally while Harry's working on his column. "Please?" he adds rather desperately.

"Yeah, what about?" Harry asks, furrowing his brows as he shuts his laptop lid.

Liam cranes his neck at them from the couch. "Everything okay, Niall?" he asks and Niall barks out the fakest laugh Harry has ever heard. "Fine, Liam," he says. "Everything is fine."

"What did you want to talk about?" Harry asks, his voice soft.

"No, not here," Niall mumbles, glancing upward. He leads Harry downstairs to the basement of the complex. It's dry, but it has a lingering  _wet_  scent to its barren concrete walls. Harry's arms bristle with goose bumps at the chilly air as Niall walks around, tapping at the walls. "Good, no cameras or mics here," he says once satisfied.

"What?" Harry asks.

"Listen, Harry, before we start," Niall starts, scrubbing his hands over his face with a sigh. "You know I love you and Louis, right?"

"Yeah," Harry says, drawing out the word uncertainly, wondering what this is all about. Niall rakes a hand through his hair, looking flustered. His ears are red by the time he starts to stumble over his words. "Harry, um, there are cameras literally  _everywhere_. And, um, my super called me in earlier this week and—"

"Oh, my God," Harry groans, smacking his forehead as realization of how utterly  _stupid_  he is dawns over him. "They know?" he breathes, his heart slamming against his ribs. How could they not have foreseen this? Their lives are almost completely orchestrated by the government, so of course they're under constant surveillance. "About me and Louis?"

Niall nods, swallowing hard. "Harry, I love you, so I'm telling you this as a warning, okay? If you two want to remain mates, you're going to have to leave the city, or go into hiding or  _something_ or else they're gonna—they're gonna wipe your memories, and  _ours_."

Harry's stomach drops to his toes; he feels like he's going to be sick. "They can't do that, can they?" he asks desperately.

"They have before," Niall says, his voice hollow. "They use it on people who figure out the soul mate and bond breaking things or the wa—um, other stuff like that. They're not gonna stop the practice now."

"I have to tell Louis," Harry whispers, feeling even more like he's going to be sick. Granted, they both took part in breaking the law, but it's entirely his fault since he convinced Louis to sleep with him (okay so it didn't take a whole lot of convincing, but  _still_ ). Now the two of them have endangered all of their friends within the course of one night. Harry takes the stairs one at a time, his feet feeling like lead with every step. His insides feel like they have been scrambled, much like his racing thoughts. He catches sight of Louis sitting on the sofa with a book when he reaches the top stair, looking completely unperturbed and Harry's heart sinks even further because Louis looks more at peace than he has in ages and he's going to disrupt that. Niall claps him on the shoulder, giving it a tight, reassuring squeeze. Harry sighs as Niall brushes past him and collects his courage before reluctantly walking over. "We need to talk, Louis," Harry murmurs and Louis looks up from his book, his smile fading in his uncertainty. Harry eases himself onto the sofa, holding Louis' hands in both of his. "Niall told me that they know."

Louis swallows, his Adam's apple visibly bobbing. His blue eyes are wide and full of doubt and Harry wants to kiss him okay, but he can't in front of everyone else. " _They_  they?" he asks and Harry nods with a sigh. The inevitable and ominous  _they_. "We need to figure some things out," he says softly. "Like what we're going to do if you end up being pregnant."

"I'm not having an abortion," Louis says listlessly. "I've already lost one baby; I don't want to do it on purpose."

"Louis," Harry says gently. "I would  _never_  ask you to do that. It would be my baby, too, and I wouldn't want to see something as precious as our child just destroyed." Louis nods uncertainly and Harry squeezes his hands. "We're gonna be okay," he promises, though he isn't sure of that at all.

 

At dinner, Nick sits unusually close to Louis, who puts all his energy into acting like he doesn't want to run and lock himself in his room. Harry makes it a little easier, though, giving Louis small smiles from across the table, but Louis can't hide his startled jump when Nick places a hand on his thigh under the table and leaves it there. Louis is even more uncomfortable throughout the rest of dinner and Nick's hand just travels higher on his leg. He wants to cry out when Nick digs his fingers into the fleshier parts of his thigh. If Nick had any sort of affection for him, Louis doubts he would display it in front of the company of the complex, so he's caught completely off guard when Nick leans over to whisper in his ear.

"I'm ruining you after we're done here," Nick whispers and Louis closes his eyes as he desperately tries to refrain from throwing up at the dinner table.  _So much for affection_ , he thinks sullenly. Nick is highly impatient through the remainder of dinner, with Louis eating deliberately slow to hopefully put Nick out of the mood, but his efforts prove to be fruitless. Suddenly, Nick pushes away from the table and gets to his feet, grabbing Louis by his upper arm. "Excuse us," Nick apologizes, though Louis knows it's completely insincere, "but we're going to call it a night." Harry looks indifferent, but Louis can tell from the way his nostrils are flaring that he's completely furious.

"I think Louis is still eating," Zayn offers quietly, catching Louis' eye. Louis makes a mental note to tell Zayn that he loves him more often.

"He'll be fine," Nick says. "Besides, he should start watching his weight, yeah? Look at him, he's enormous." Nick barks out a laugh as he smacks Louis' bum. Louis is beyond humiliated and Harry’s face is twisted so that it looks as if he's trying to lay an egg. Nick shoves him roughly down the hallway to their room and the decision making portion of Louis' brain shuts itself off as his instincts kick in no matter how badly he doesn't want to be in that room. Nick's hands are smooth, but he's rough with them, unlike Harry, whose hands are rough and calloused, but he touched Louis so gently as if he feared he were made of glass. Nick handles him like he wants to break him, and Louis wouldn't put it past him. Nick noses at his neck, breathing deeply, and frowns slightly, but doesn't stop tugging at Louis' sweater. "What the fuck?" Nick asks glaringly and Louis tenses; he's still a little full, so he looks rounder without his sweater. "You need to stop gorging yourself while I'm away," Nick continues. "I don't want to have to fuck a whale." Louis feels the tears prickling at the backs of his eyes as Nick palms himself through his jeans, muttering something about  _having to get it up himself_. Nick noses at his neck again, frowning deeper this time. "You smell different," he says lowly, his eyes drifting down Louis' front. "Are you pregnant again?" He leans in again, sniffing at Louis' neck, dangerously close to his new mark, courtesy of Harry, that covers Nick’s almost identically. Nick narrows his eyes. "You don't smell like it, but you look it," he says, pressing a hand down hard on Louis' lower stomach.

Louis bites back a whimper of pain and shakes his head. "I'm not," he mumbles.

"You're not what?" Nick prompts coldly.

"I'm not pregnant," Louis whispers, ignoring the voice in the back of his head as it screams the possibility of the opposite. Nick wrinkles his nose and Louis is crestfallen, knowing that wasn't convincing enough.

"Whatever," Nick says with a sigh. "I'm no longer in the mood. I'll have to get you pregnant after you get rid of that," Nick says, pointing accusingly at Louis' slightly rounded stomach. Louis squirms, wrapping his arms around himself, but he still feels Nick's eyes on him, and they cut like knives. "You really need to get a handle on your weight." Nick disappears into the bathroom and Louis crawls under the sheets, the tears relentlessly streaming down his cheeks.

Nick slips beneath the covers an hour or so later, falling asleep immediately like he normally does. Louis pretends for a good half hour just to be absolutely certain before slipping out from under the sheets and out of the room into the hallway. Harry’s door is slightly ajar, so Louis scurries over, slipping in.

Harry is still awake, the glow of his laptop sharpening his features. He glances up at the sound of Louis entering and quickly shuts the lid, pushing it aside as Louis clambers onto the bed, latching onto Harry. “What happened?” Harry asks quietly as he plays with Louis’ hair the way he knows he likes it.

Louis sniffs. “He’s suspicious,” he mumbles, his arms tightening around Harry’s narrow hips. He debates mentioning the things Nick said about him, because they cut really deep, but Harry's giving him a look that feels like he can read his thoughts. “He called me a whale, Harry," he says after a while, digging his fingers into his thighs accusingly.

Harry furrows his brows. “Louis, you’re not at all heavy." Louis pouts at him and Harry realizes that the damage has already been done, so all that's left is to try and build him up. "You're fine, trust me," Harry assures him, tapping the tip of his nose. " _I_  love your body the way it is. Why do you want to impress Nick so much?"

Louis sighs, a small smile tugging at his lips. "You're right," he mumbles. "I don't care what he has to say to me anymore."

"There you go," Harry coos as non-infantilizing-ly as he can.

"I just really hate how he can get into my head like that," Louis mumbles as Harry presses a kiss to the side of his head. "I hate him so much, Harry."

"I know you do, baby," Harry says softly, kissing the middle of Louis' forehead. "Do you want me to kick his ass?"

Louis nuzzles his face into Harry's chest. "Not yet," he says. "He'll get really suspicious if you do that, and we're staying under the radar, remember?"

"Yeah," Harry sighs, ruffling Louis' hair. "We're not doing a very good job of it, are we?"

"No, I suppose not," Louis says thoughtfully. "It could be worse, though."

Harry raises his eyebrows. "How could it be worse?" he asks. "If we don't stop this or go into hiding or something, they're gonna wipe our memories. It's going to be as if I'd never met you, and that's the worst possible thing."

"As satisfying is it is to hear that, I have to disagree," Louis says, playing with the tips of Harry's fingers. "The worst possible thing is us not being  _us_. I mean, what am I gonna do without  _you?_  I need someone to kick Nick's ass for me, and I'm sure as hell that Liam wouldn't do it for me."

Harry chuckles softly, dropping a kiss to the top of Louis' head. "You're terrible," he says.

"You love me, though," Louis says, looking up at Harry with doe-like eyes.

"Yeah," Harry says. "Always."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you so much for reading!!!!
> 
>  
> 
> [my tumblr](http://dirtshag.tumblr.com/)


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hiiiii  
> thank you for being so patient!

Four weeks of Louis sneaking into Harry's room after Nick has fallen asleep pass before anything goes awry.  Niall has warned them countless times of what's at stake, but they figure as long as they don't tell anyone that bond breaking is possible, they'll be fine, but they could not have been more wrong. Louis complains about feeling dizzy and achy, so Liam suggests that he go see a doctor, which Louis doesn't want to do, but agrees only if Harry goes with. Liam says nothing about Louis' odd request, but Niall shakes his head ever so slightly. So now Louis is sat in a waiting room with Harry. Louis wants to hold his hand, but like Niall warned, there are cameras everywhere. A nurse calls his name and Harry helps him to his feet before they walk over to the nurse, who greets them enthusiastically. She takes Louis' height and weight before leading the way into a private room, where she checks a few more of his vitals. She informs them that the doctor will be with them shortly before slipping out of the room. Tears well up at Louis' lower lids and Harry swipes them away, cooing at him. "What's wrong, Lou?" he asks.

"I'm scared, Harry," Louis mumbles.

"You'll be fine, love," Harry whispers, kissing Louis' forehead as the door opens and a frizzy redheaded alpha walks in. "Hello, Louis," she chirps, sounding Scottish. "I'm Dr. Behlhost. What seems to be troubling you?"

"I ache all over and I'm dizzy when I stand up," Louis reports, his stomach tightening with nerves. He feels like he's going to be sick as she flips through her clipboard.

"Well, it looks like all of your vitals are in check," she says, flashing him a warm smile. "Would you object to giving me a blood sample?"

"No, I guess not," Louis mumbles and Harry squeezes his hand.

"Great," Dr. Behlhost beams. Once she's got a sample, she tells them that the results will take a few moments to generate and that she'll be right back. Louis shakes, so Harry smoothes his hands up and down Louis' arms soothingly. They sit in a heavy silence until Dr. Behlhost returns a few moments later, her smile wider than before. "Congratulations, Louis," she says. "You're about four weeks pregnant, so the scent should present itself very soon." Harry squeezes his hand as Louis tries not to faint. Dr. Behlhost explains vaguely what changes his body will be going through, but sends them to a specialist two floors up, with a few pamphlets in hand. Louis doesn't start crying until they're in the elevator.

"Aren't you happy?" Harry asks, his eyes wide.

"Yes," Louis sniffles. "But we've got so much more at stake now, Harry," he says, pressing a hand to his stomach.

"We're gonna be okay," Harry promises, drawing Louis into his arms and dropping a kiss to the top of his head.

A nurse greets them at the elevator doors. "Hello," she greets. "Dr. Behlhost sent you?" Harry nods for Louis and she smiles, leading them to a private room. "Dr. Bai will be with you shortly," she promises and scurries out of the room.

They sit in silence for a while, taking in the room. Its pale blue walls are home to a multitude of posters proclaiming the symptoms of pregnancy and the importance of prenatal care. There's one that depicts the different stages of development and Louis glances away once he gets to the birth part as a woman with sleek black hair and eyes so brown they're nearly black enters the room. "Good afternoon," she greets. "I'm Dr. Bai. You must be Mr. and Mr. Tomlinson." Harry doesn't bat an eye, but Louis shifts a little uncomfortably (guiltily) at her assumption, but it goes unnoticed by Dr. Bai. "We have a lot to talk about today," she says. "Now, I want the both of you to remember that I'm a professional and everything said in this room is completely confidential."

"It is?" Harry asks and Dr. Bai nods. "I’ve already brought up both your families’ medical histories, so we won’t have to discuss that. All good things,” she assures, noticing Louis’ pallor. Harry squeezes his hand again. “Both your families seem to be in utmost health,” she says with a light laugh and Louis almost rolls his eyes at this; of course they are: the past five generations have been genetically matched to prevent the more serious malformations. “And I’m assuming that neither of you have had any chronic illnesses?” Both Louis and Harry shake their heads. No one has suffered from anything less than the common cold in years. The genetic facilities managed to rid the world of the most deadly diseases, but not the common cold. Go figure. Dr. Bai rattles off a number of questions like if either of them smoke, drink, do any other drugs and/or medication (no, occasionally,  _once_ , and only prescriptions such as vitamins or for pain). “Now, I'd like to ask you both a few questions individually. Is that okay?" Harry glances at Louis, who nods. "Great," Dr. Bai beams. "Louis, could I talk to you first, please?"

"Okay," Louis murmurs reluctantly as Harry’s hand slips from his.

"Harry, if you could, please," Dr. Bai urges, gesturing toward the door.

"Right, of course," Harry mutters and slips out, closing the door softly.

"How many partners have you had, Louis?" Dr. Bai asks and Louis nearly chokes. "Um, two," he mutters, figuring it's better to just be honest with his doctor. Dr. Bai raises her brows, but says nothing as she scribbles it down. "Have you had any STDs and/or STIs?" Louis shakes his head and she scribbles it down. "Have you been or are a victim of any type of abuse?"

Louis swallows hard. "Um, my old alpha abused me sexually and psychologically," he murmurs, rubbing his arms to force the goose bumps back into his skin. "And still kind of does."

"Old alpha?" Dr. Bai asks, pen poised.

"Um, he thinks he's still bonded with me, but, um...."

"Oh," Dr. Bai says, which is troublesome to hear, so Louis starts to panic. Dr. Bai seems to notice this and gives him a reassuring smile. "You would not believe how many omegas like you come through that door. I’m not able to report you, Louis," she says and Louis relaxes.  _So there are other people who know about bond breaking_ , he thinks. "Are you comfortable giving me a name or talking about it?” Dr. Bai prompts slowly.

Louis sighs, wrapping his arms around himself. "His name is Nick Grimshaw. We were matched about six months ago. It started the first night we moved into the complex," he recalls with a slight shudder. "He took me into his room and started, um,  _touching_  me, but before anything too bad happened, Harry stopped him and brought me into his room. That only made Nick angrier, so by the time my heat was over—"

"You were with an alpha that you weren’t matched with during your heat?" Dr. Bai asks.

Louis shakes his head. "I used to live with three alphas and a 'highly aggressive beta' before I got my letter. They're all very protective of me, like a little brother—Harry was one of them, so he had no intentions of doing anything with me,” he sighs. That bit is no longer accurate. “I woke up in the middle of my heat and locked myself in the bathroom ‘til it was over. I guess my heat wasn't completely over when I unlocked myself from the bathroom because Nick took me into his room and got me pregnant the first time... while I slept. When I lost it two months later, he beat me." Louis is crying now, the pain of everything that’s happened to him crashing over him, and Dr. Bai pushes a box of tissues his way. After he's blown his nose, Louis soldiers on softly. "It took me three months to recover from the miscarriage," he says shakily, "and the whole time he just told me it was my fault. Everything hurt so much, and honestly, I wouldn't be here if it weren't for my friends, especially Harry. Nick is away a lot for work, so Harry just kind of held me through it all when he was gone and a few weeks ago, we got drunk and," he shrugs, "here we are."

“Is this the only instance of abuse that you’ve endured?” Dr. Bai asks softly. Louis nods and she writes it down before patting his thigh reassuringly. "Louis, you would not believe how many omegas there are that are in your situation," she says, giving him a small, reassuring smile. 

"Really? How many?" he asks out of curiosity and Dr. Bai shakes her head. "Sorry, confidential. But if you need any type of assistance, we have many, many clinics available for patrons in your situation. I can give you a list of the clinics, if you'd like."

"Um, no thank you," he murmurs.

"Are you sure? They're very professional and have helped thousands. Everything is completely confidential." Louis shakes his head and she gives him a sympathetic smile but doesn't press it any further. "One more thing: Do you think these instances of abuse will affect your pregnancy or how you plan to parent?" Dr. Bai says. Louis hesitates; Nick will still be in the complex and he's going to find out sooner or later, but he also has Harry to protect him, so he shakes his head. "Thank you for your cooperation, Louis," she says with a smile. "I assure you, you’re in good hands here. Could you send Harry in for me, please?"

Louis nods, mumbling a ‘thank you’ and slips out. "Your turn," he says and Harry looks up at him with wide eyes. "You were in there for so long," Harry says.

"There was a lot to talk about," Louis mutters. Harry nods and presses a kiss to his forehead before slipping into the room, leaving Louis on his own. Louis settles on the bench, his arms wrapped around his middle. He desperately wants this baby, but they'll definitely have to go into hiding now. He sighs, rubbing his now flat stomach, hoping it will offer himself some sort of comfort.

Harry steps out of the room a few moments later. "Louis, Dr. Bai would like to speak with us both." Louis nods and Harry helps him to his feet, his hand on the small of Louis' back when they re-enter the room. Louis feels his heart swell with affection because Harry is so endearing and gentle with him and he's never had anything close to it. Dr. Bai describes what his pregnancy should look like and schedules their next appointment, but Louis is too busy imagining his life with Harry and watching how intently he listens to Dr. Bai. Louis wants to kiss him because Harry has never treated him anything below extraordinary and now he's carrying his baby and that's the most wonderful thing despite their precarious situation.

 

“Dr. Bai recommended this,” Harry says, squinting at the bottle. “I think.” He glances at her scribbled writing and sighs. Doctors may have managed to cure most of the world’s deadly diseases, but it seems like they haven’t found the cure to their indecipherable handwriting. “I guess we’ll just get both kinds,” he says decidedly, and Louis smiles up at him, threading their fingers together despite knowing that there are cameras. Really, how much more trouble could they get into for holding hands? Harry gives him a quick smile back, squeezing his fingers. He’d been adamant about them getting Louis’ recommended medication directly after finishing up at his appointment. They’re stood in the pharmacy, peering at the vast array of drugs when Harry asks Louis what he thinks it is.

Louis just laughs, nuzzling his face into the fabric of Harry’s jacket. “Honestly, Harry,” he says, biting back a smile. “It’s just a bunch of cells at the moment. We won’t get to find out for another four months.” Harry just shrugs, smiling sheepishly. He mumbles under his breath as he reads off the note Dr. Bai gave them, and when he can’t read that, he pulls out one of the many pamphlets she gave them. He reads off that, placing the recommended vitamins into the basket with Louis hanging off his arm.

“Louis?”

All of the positive emotions that had filled him are doused with terror. Louis detaches himself from Harry as quickly as he can and swallows hard as Nick approaches them, his brows furrowed. “What are you doing here?” he asks, not looking at Louis, but looking Harry up and down.

“I, um, went to the doctors’,” Louis mumbles.

“Why is  _he_  with you?” Nick asks, nodding toward Harry in a way that only he can manage as accusingly.

“He didn’t want to go alone,” Harry says, shifting his arm so that Nick won’t see all the prenatal vitamins in the basket. “Didn’t want to be out in the city all by himself, and frankly, Liam wouldn't let him leave by himself.”

“I didn’t know you’d be back from your trip today,” Louis says conversationally, hoping to draw Nick’s attention back to himself. Nick sighs. “I’m back only for tonight,” he says. “Then I have to fly to Beijing for two weeks. I’m just picking up some more pills for my headaches. It’s loud in Beijing," he adds conversationally.

“Oh,” Louis mumbles. “Are you coming home tonight or…?”

Nick shakes his head. “I’m just staying in a hotel for the night.” He sighs again, raking a hand through his hair. “Listen, I’ve been thinking about how I’ve been treating you recently and I just want to say that I’m sorry.” Louis’ breath hitches; he wasn’t expecting any type of apology from Nick. “I know this is unwarranted, but—”

“Unwarranted,” Harry snorts under his breath.

“Excuse me?” Nick asks, dropping his uncharacteristic softness.

“That’s bullshit,” Harry says, and Louis nudges him, hissing his name.

Nick raises his brows. “I’m sorry,” he says. “I didn’t realize that you were in charge of our relationship.” Harry balls up his fists as Louis places a hand on his elbow, whispering, “Harry, don’t. Please.” Harry shakes his head. “Sorry,” he mutters. “It’s just that I’m still a little  _attached_  to Louis.”

Nick stares at him, but disregards it with a shake of his head. “Anyway,” he says. “I’ve come to realize that I’m not going to get anything out of you by treating you like I have, so I’d just like to apologize.”

 _In the middle of a pharmacy_ , Louis thinks, entirely unamused. “It’s gonna take a lot to make up for what you’ve done to me,” he says quietly, hoping to whatever ethereal force there may be that Nick decides that he doesn’t actually want to do this.

“I know,” Nick murmurs. “I’m going to start now.” He gestures to the book clutched in his hand. The title reads  _How to Relate to Your Omega_ by Dr. James Carlisle, Ph. D. “It’s not much, but I think it’ll be fundamental to what I’m trying to accomplish.” He gives Louis a small smile that Louis has no intention of returning, but forces himself to anyway. “Anyway,” Nick says, returning to his business-like composure. “I’ll see you when I return.” He steps forward, his head tilted as if he’s debating whether or not he should touch Louis, so he just settles for an awkward handshake before scurrying off.

“That was strange,” Harry murmurs once he’s disappeared among the medical books.

“Yeah,” Louis breathes, his heart twisting with some emotion he can’t recognize. “Have you got everything?” he asks, nodding toward the basket.

“Yeah,” Harry answers. “But I want to pick up a couple books.” Louis rolls his eyes fondly. Harry has this glint in his eyes as he glances at titles and scans reviews. Louis’ stomach flutters because Harry looks so happy and intent on giving their child the best head start they can manage. Despite all the trouble that’s bound to find them, Louis wouldn’t have it any other way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading!!!  
> any guesses as to what's going to happen next? :)
> 
>  
> 
> [my tumblr](http://dirtshag.tumblr.com/)


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> basically a filler chapter giving you some more background on louis and a greater idea of the world they live in
> 
> sorry i took so long and this is so short. i got stuck in writer's block :C

Louis had always been quite rambunctious as a child, getting into nearly everything he possibly could. The knees of his trousers were constantly stained from the chlorophyll of the small patch of green grass in the backyard. His mother always wondered how he managed to get them so green with the small amount of it. His elbows and knees were continuously scabbed, since he never let his cuts and abrasions of playtime fully heal, much to his mother’s dismay. He had caused many of his mother’s headaches from his uninhibited misadventures, and Johannah was certain that he’d grow up to be an alpha, or at least a beta since the last omega in their family had been her own grandmother. When he turned thirteen, she expected him to come bounding down the stairs just like any other morning, shouting and jeering his new omegaverse status happily. Instead, after a good half hour of absolute silence, she opened his bedroom door to find him silently paging through a book, an act he hadn’t done since he learned how to run. She was of course taken aback and slightly thrilled at the sudden quiet, but also very concerned, so she brought him to a specialist just to be absolutely certain, who confirmed her fears.

Louis was an omega.

Male omegas are not as abundant as their female counterparts, and are considered quite rare. They’re arguably more valuable than the average female omega due to their rarity, but an omega of either gender is considered treasure-like. She tried her best to keep her son out of danger, but an omega’s scent is a lot stronger than that of a beta’s. She switched him to a private school where the school body was made up almost entirely of omegas; so naturally, Louis was one of about ten boys in a school of one hundred fifty. There, Louis would be safe if his heat ever sprung up in the middle of the day (it rarely did so; it was quite regulated to bimonthly), but she still insisted he take suppressants. She spent the majority of his teenage years warning him about the prowess of alphas, growing even more reluctant and wary of his fast approaching eighteenth birthday, where he would leave the little nest she’d created so painstakingly.

She nearly fainted when he told her that he would be moving into a flat that four alphas called their home, wondering how on earth he was so calm about it after all the warnings she had filled his head with. It’s not that alphas are bad people, she had always told him, they just have trouble controlling themselves. She never wanted him to believe that alphas were bad people, but she made him wary of their underlying intent. Obviously, she had done her job well because he called her after two months of living with those alphas to say that they were all such good friends and treated him like a little brother. She was happy to hear that they were keeping such a close eye on him, so she invited them all over for Christmas, but only the one called Harry was able to make it. The others had adamantly apologized for missing it (they all had their own families to visit), but assured her that they would meet her sometime soon. She had been nervous to meet one of the alphas her son called such a good friend, but after meeting with him, she realized how  _loved_  her son was.

Harry was so kind and polite and obviously cared a lot about Louis. He assured her that he and his friends were always watching out for her son, that his presence in the flat is a blessing or else they would have all torn each other to pieces over a stupid argument about the remote control. Louis acts as mediator between them when they argue, he explained. He talked about how Louis is always making sure the place is clean or that they themselves are, and in return, they keep him safe and loved. He realized that ‘loved’ wasn’t the best word to use, seeing Louis’ mother’s expression, so he quickly explained that Louis is still unmated, that all of them are, and Louis just hides out in his room during his heats or they all go out until it’s over. Jay had visibly relaxed at that, comforted by the fact that these boys were taking such great care of her son.

***

“Louis, dear, I can’t understand you.” She had been in the middle of getting his younger siblings out of bed when he called late one morning. He sounded like he had been crying.

 _"Sorry, Mum,"_ he sniffled. _"I'm just scared."_

“What is it that’s bothering you?” she asked, frowning.

 _“I got my letter.”_ Her heart sank at how broken he sounded. She knew what was going through his mind. His friends were the only alphas he was really comfortable around, and now he’s being forced to bond with a complete stranger. She heard him sigh audibly. _“But Liam got Niall to pull a few strings and they’re able to be with me. We’re moving into a larger complex on the edge of the city later today. Oh, and Zayn isn’t actually an alpha; apparently he’s just an ‘overly aggressive beta’ as his letter put it. He and Liam were matched.”_

“That’s wonderful!” she exclaimed, happy for his friends. “It won’t be that bad, then, will it?”

 _“No, I guess not,”_ he said with a sigh.

“They’ll keep you safe, darling,” she murmured into the silence, knowing how worried he must have been.

 _“I know,”_ he said. _“I’ll call you if there’s any news.”_

“All right, sweetheart,” she said and the call ended with a  _click_.

***

She had been watering her indoor plants when he rang again four weeks later, his voice sounding wrecked.

 _"Mum, I-I'm. I hate him, Mum,"_ Louis cried.

"Shhh, slow down, darling," she cooed. "What is it? What's happened?"

 _"He's absolutely awful,"_ he whispered. _"The minute we walked into the complex for the first time, he shoved me into his room and—"_ He made a choking sort of sound before muttering, _"Harry saved me from him. He's so protective of me and I love him for that, but...."_ He trailed off and Jay didn't want to force it out of him, so she just waited patiently, listening to the sound of his breathing on the other end. _"I'm pregnant, Mum. I don't want it."_

"Louis, love," she said levelly. She had always suspected this would happen; Louis had always been a bit of a romantic, so he'd concocted his own ideas on how the universe worked and she had to very gently break it to him that people don't fall in love anymore. People get matched and babies happen. That's how their world worked. "That's not how it works."

 _"I can't have this baby if he's the father,"_ Louis retorted. _"He's a monster, Mum."_

Jay sighed. Louis' exposure to alphas was very limited, and he was both lucky and unlucky that his friends had treated him the way they did. "Not all alphas are like your friends, love," she whispered. "I'm sorry, but the way your alpha acts is how many of them do. I'm sorry that you had this happen to you, but—"

 _"I can't believe you're defending him,"_ Louis hissed. _"I can't believe you're defending this whole orchestrated bullshit."_

"Louis," she sighed, bracing against the kitchen counter. "I wouldn't have you if it weren't for the matching, pet."

 _"I—"_ his voice hitched. It was filled with cracks the next time he spoke. _"Mum, I... I don't think I can do this."_

"You can, darling," she assured him. "You're not the only one in this position, love."

 _"I know,"_ he whined, _"but I'm scared."_

"I know you are, love," she soothed, wishing she could hold him and pet his hair like he'd always liked. "You can do it, dear. Call me if there's any news."

 _"Okay,"_ he replied shakily. _"I love you."_

"I love you, too, darling."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading!!!!!
> 
>  
> 
> [my tumblr](http://dirtshag.tumblr.com/)


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> now back to the plot!  
> thank you for being so patient with me c:
> 
> longest chapter so far omg!!!!

Louis sighs as he examines himself in the mirror. Although his skin is the clearest it's ever been, his cheeks have filled out slightly, and the rest of his body seems to be doing the same thing. He suspects that further in his pregnancy, his hips will widen along with his thighs, much to his dismay. He puts himself at nine weeks now, and everyone else seems to be picking up on the scent. He huffs in annoyance and tugs on a shirt, although it's getting tight. He emerges from the bathroom to find Harry on the bed, the light from his laptop illuminating his features. He shuts the lid, pushing it aside, and spreads his arms as Louis crawls into the sheets with him, snuggling into his chest. "I'm getting fat, Harry," he mumbles and Harry sighs, raking a hand soothingly through his hair. "You're not fat, Louis," he says. "You're pregnant."

Louis is quiet for a moment, huddling further into Harry's warmth. "We should tell them," he says. "They're starting to notice the scent. We're not going to be able to keep it from them much longer."

Harry shifts uneasily. "Louis, we have another problem," he breathes. "I got my letter."

Louis' heart sinks. He and Harry were finally  _happy_  after so long and now everything they've worked toward will be disrupted by an outsider. He wants to cry. "What are we gonna do, Harry?" he whispers and Harry runs a hand through his hair soothingly. "We have to leave," he whispers, sighing softly. "We can't stay here anymore."

"Where would we go?" Louis asks, looking up at him, feeling immensely small.

"Niall told me that his brother is the leader of a rebel group just outside the city," Harry murmurs. "He said that they're always taking in refugees and that they'll probably help us."

"Probably?" Louis asks. "That doesn't sound very reassuring."

"It's the best we've got, Louis," Harry tells him. "I think we should tell everyone tonight and leave tomorrow morning."

Louis sighs, holding his aching head. "I need to call my mum," he mumbles and disentangles himself from Harry. "I want to spend a few days with her before we leave the city. I think it's best to, um, say goodbye." Harry nods and leans over to press a kiss to his temple. He rolls out of their bed and heads to the closet, pulling out a few duffel bags. Louis collects himself before dialing his mother as Harry begins packing up their things.

 _"Hello, love,"_ she greets.

"Listen, Mum, there's something I need to tell you," Louis whispers into the phone. He can almost  _hear_  her brow furrowing.

 _"What is it, sweetheart?"_ she asks and Louis squirms. "We can't talk about it over the phone," he says. Niall had warned him that all phone calls are recorded and listened to, and he had long since decided that he'll be taking as many precautions as he can. "Can I spend a few days at yours?"

 _"Of course you can, darling,"_ she gushes. _"I'll tidy up your old room. When will you be coming over?"_

Louis bites his lip, his gaze landing on Harry, who's busy packing their clothes. "Erm, tomorrow. Is that okay?"

 _"That's fine, love,"_ she assures him. _"I can't wait to see you. How's your pregnancy going? I haven't heard from you in nearly seven months."_  His hands shake so much that Louis almost drops his phone. His mouth feels dry and his stomach is doing flips. How could she know about his pregnancy? Louis fights the urge to throw up as he realizes that he never told his mother that he miscarried. She's expecting him to look like he's about to pop and his heart sinks; yet another disappointment he'll be stuffing into his mother's already fragile heart. It's not just something he can tell her over the phone, so he tells a small lie that isn't really a lie at all. "It's fine, Mum," he says softly, still feeling like he's going to be sick, and it's not due to his pregnancy. "I'll see you tomorrow."

 _"Bye, sweetheart. See you soon,"_ she says and the call ends. Louis bursts into tears and Harry drops everything, hurrying over to Louis so he can wipe away his tears and coo at him. "What's wrong, baby?" he asks and Louis chokes. "That," he says and Harry furrows his brow. "I never told my mum about the miscarriage," he says, gripping onto Harry's hand. "She thinks I'm still pregnant with Nick's baby. She's expecting me to show up nearly eight months pregnant tomorrow and I'm barely showing! I'm going to give her a heart attack when she opens the door, Harry," he sobs, burying his face in his alpha's chest.

Harry runs his fingers up and down Louis' back, pressing small kisses to the top of his head. He doesn't bother telling him that it'll be okay, because it's obviously not.  "Let's just lie down for a while, yeah?" he suggests, and Louis nods, allowing Harry to pull him into bed.

"Harry," he mumbles after a while.

"Yeah?"

"Nick's coming back tomorrow morning. I'm not sure when, but can we leave before he gets back, please?"

Harry tucks Louis closer to him, pressing a kiss to his forehead. "Course we can."

 

After a stressful dinner, with Harry squeezing his hand under the table, Louis catches Harry's eye and nods ever so slightly. Harry calls for everyone's attention, saying that he's got an announcement, and herds them all into the living room. "I got my letter," he says and Liam claps him on the back, his eyes crinkling with his smile. Zayn offers him a smile and Louis feels suddenly guilty; Zayn is days away from delivering his and Liam's baby and he and Harry won't be around to meet their little boy. Niall keeps his face straight, blinking at Harry unsurprised. His omega, Amy, nudges him for being so rude, so he breaks his professional demeanor, giving Harry a small smile. Harry takes a deep breath before continuing. "I'm not staying here," he murmurs.

Liam frowns at this, his brow furrowed. "Harry," he starts.

"Louis's coming with me," Harry mutters. "We're leaving tomorrow morning."

"What? Why?" Liam asks, thoroughly confused. He looks around, but everyone seems just as confused as him, except Niall, that is. "Niall," he asks, narrowing his eyes at him. "Do you know what this is about?"

"Yes," Niall mumbles, getting to his feet. "Harry and Louis are leaving because I asked them to. They broke the law and I'm taking care of it."

"The law?" Zayn asks, his eyes wide as he looks from Niall to Harry and Louis.

"Yeah," Niall says, glancing back at Harry. "Louis broke his bond with Nick, so now he and Harry are mates."

"That's possible?" Amy asks and Niall's gaze lands on her, slightly sad. "Yeah, it's possible," he mumbles. Louis wonders what that's about, but Niall's voice brings him back to the conversation. "Anyway, they're leaving so that none of us get in trouble." He claps Harry on the shoulder, giving it a tight squeeze. "Thanks, buddy." Harry squeezes his shoulder back, affirming that they'll all be okay.

"Where are you two going?" Liam asks, his mouth pulled into a line of worried concern. Louis knows he doesn't condone this, and Liam is probably disappointed in him for what he's done, but that won't stop him from worrying about his friends. As his throat tightens, Louis realizes that he really shouldn't take his friends for granted.

"It's probably best if we don't tell you," he murmurs, knotting his fingers together. "We don't want any of you getting hurt."

"What about the two of you?" Liam asks with a frown.

"They'll be safe where they're going," Niall assures him, re-adopting his professional demeanor.

"We're gonna miss you all," Louis whispers, feeling the tears prickle at the backs of his eyes.

"Come here, Louis," Zayn says, patting the space beside him. Louis shuffles over and takes a seat, Zayn pulling him in for a hug as soon as he hits the cushion. "I was gonna make you a godfather," he mumbles and Louis nearly chokes, letting the tears fall. He holds onto Zayn as tightly and for as long as he can, wondering how on earth he's going to survive without his friends. They pull apart and Zayn reaches out to lightly cup his jaw. "You'll keep in touch, though, won't you?" he asks softly, thumbing away Louis' tears.

"We'll try," Louis whispers. "I can't make any promises, though."

"Either way, I wish you the best of luck," Zayn says softly, patting his cheek.

"Thank you," Louis whispers as Liam's hand settles on his shoulder. "We'll all miss you and Harry, Louis," he mumbles, his fingers squeezing into Louis' shoulder. He pulls Louis into a tight hug, murmuring how he has to get Zayn to bed. He lets him go and helps Zayn to his feet, leading him down the hall. Amy presses a kiss to his cheek before scurrying off down the hall to her and Niall's room. Louis touches his cheek where she kissed him, surprised, because he didn't know she even liked him.

"You two had better head off to bed," Niall says tiredly. "You've got an early morning ahead of you."

Harry pulls him into a hug that Louis half expects Niall will not return, but he does. "Thank you for everything you've done for us," Harry murmurs and Niall just sighs as Harry releases him. He reaches out for Louis, but Louis just snares him in a hug, making Niall huff indignantly, but he relaxes into the hug anyway. "Thank you," Louis murmurs and Niall squeezes him just a bit tighter. "You guys are my family," he whispers. "I'd do anything for you. Head off to bed now. You've got a long day tomorrow. Be safe, guys."

He releases Louis and Harry reaches out, tugging Louis into his side as Niall gives them one last nod before heading off down the hall after Amy. "It's just you and me now, love," Harry murmurs as Louis nuzzles his face into his chest. "Let's go to bed, yeah?" he asks and leads them down the hall into his bedroom.

 

"Louis, come on, baby," Harry rouses him, gently shaking his shoulder. Louis just groans, huddling further into the sheets. "We have to get going, love," Harry presses. Having expected this from Louis, he woke him up earlier than they had planned.

"Five more minutes," Louis mumbles.

"Sorry, love," Harry whispers and scoops Louis into his arms, taking him away from the warm comfort of the bed. Louis whines, only half awake. "Put me down," he whines and Harry just hefts him further into his arms. "We have to leave soon," he murmurs. "Or they'll take away our memories and little bean. You don't want that, do you?"

Louis just groans, throwing an arm over his stomach as if that will offer any more protection to himself and the baby. "No," he mumbles, snuggling into Harry's chest. Harry walks into the bathroom, setting Louis on his feet. "Take a quick shower and get dressed. I'll make you some breakfast and pack the car." He presses a quick kiss to his lips before shutting the door behind him. Louis slowly rids himself of his clothes, his body still not fully awake, and steps into the shower, letting the warm water ease him into consciousness. As he shampoos, he thinks about how drastically his life has changed in just eight short months. His friends' lives have changed for the better, but his just seems to be on a course of destruction. He sighs, running his fingers over the soft swell of his tummy and praying that things will start turning around for him, for the sake of his baby.

Harry has breakfast ready for him when he enters the kitchen and he's just barely sat down when the door opens. Nick walks in, looking completely drained. Louis feels his throat getting tight as Nick dazedly furrows his brow at the two of them. "What are you two doing up?" he asks. "It's five o'clock in the morning."

"You're just getting home now?" Louis asks, trying to deflect Nick's attention back to himself.

"I was supposed to be home by midnight," Nick says with a yawn, "but m'flight was delayed. But that didn't answer my question," he says, narrowing his eyes at Harry.

"I got hungry," Louis says. "Harry was kind enough to make me some breakfast."

Nick wrinkles his nose at the smell of it. Harry had catered to one Louis' more recent cravings: pancakes with olives. "It smells like shit." Nick seems to be keeping his resolve to treat Louis better, but that doesn't bar him from offending Harry, who rolls his eyes and tucks into his own (plain) pancakes. Nick sighs and lumbers over to drop a kiss to the top of Louis' head. Louis nearly drops his fork in surprise and Harry growls lowly as Nick stumbles off down the hallway. He starts to get to his feet, but Louis stops him. "Harry, don't," he pleads. "Let's just finish eating and get out of here."

"Fine," Harry grumbles, settling back down into his seat. "The next time he touches you, though, even if it's like that, I'm snapping his neck."

"Harry, please," Louis presses. "We won't have to worry about that anymore."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading!!!!  
> are you enjoying it so far? :)
> 
>  
> 
> [my tumblr](http://dirtshag.tumblr.com/)


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so sorry this took so long! thank you for your patience :)

Louis' mum lives on the complete opposite side of the city. The trip usually takes roughly two hours, considering the heavy traffic and rough roads, but Louis needs to stop and pee about nine times, so it takes nearly three hours. The car is parked just outside the house, idling in the street. "I don't think I can do this, Harry," Louis whispers.

"Shhh, love, of course you can," Harry assures him, leaning over to press a kiss to his temple.

"This is going to kill her, Harry," Louis whimpers.

"Louis, your mum is an understanding woman. I'm sure that after we explain everything, she'll understand," Harry tells him and Louis draws a shaky breath. "You think so?" he asks and Harry nods, grabbing his hand to press kisses along the knuckles. After a moment of silence, Louis pipes up again. "I think I'm ready."

Harry nods and shuts off the engine as Louis slips out his own side. Harry grabs their bags and shoulders one of them so he has a free hand to clutch Louis' as they make their way to the door. Jay's smile is bright when she opens the door, but it quickly fades when she looks at Louis. "Louis?" she asks, her voice several pitches higher than it should be.

"We have a lot to talk about, Mum," Louis says softly and his mother hauls him into her arms, sobbing into his shoulder. “Mum,” Louis pleads. “Can we not do this at the front door?”

"Yes, of course," she sniffles, swiping at her eyes. "Come in." Within minutes, Harry and Louis are sat on the loveseat and Jay is bringing in a tray of tea, a mug for each of them. "The kids aren't up yet," she says lowly, her voice soft. "They're excited to see you, darling. They haven't seen much of you since Christmas. It breaks their little hearts, you know, to not be around you."

Louis sighs. "Mum," he says, keeping his voice low, mindful of the cameras and mics bound to be in place. "I'm sorry we've just sprung this on you, but there are things we can't say over the phone. I lost the baby about a month after I told you about. It took so long for me to recover and I just couldn't bring myself to tell you." Louis starts to cry now, so Jay swoops in, cooing over him and petting his hair like he's always liked. "Oh, pet," she whispers. "I'm so sorry. You could have at least called me, darling."

"I know," Louis chokes. "But things were moving so fast and I just—" He draws a shaky breath, scrubbing at his eyes. "Harry and I found out we're soul mates about two months ago, and I'm pregnant again. Nick doesn't know it's not his... I don't even know if he knows that I'm pregnant; he's gone so often."

"Louis," Jay murmurs.

"There's a place where we'll all be safe," Harry offers. "Louis just wanted to say goodbye since it's outside the city."

"Louis, darling, you've never been outside the city before," Jay says, concern flashing in her eyes. "You don't know what's out there."

"Mum, I'm capable of taking care of myself," Louis mutters. "And besides, I have Harry to protect me."

"I won't let any harm come to Louis. Or the baby," Harry assures her when she looks unconvinced.

"This is so dangerous," she says.

"We're trying to keep our friends safe," Harry murmurs. "We can't do that if we're still in the city."

Jay sighs, slowly shaking her head. "Mum, I'm sorry," Louis whispers, his heart clenching in his chest. His sole purpose has always been to please those around him and upsetting his mother is number one on his list of  _Things to Not Do_.

"I'm not upset, darling," she says as if she could read his thoughts (Louis wouldn't doubt it, if he's completely honest), running a hand through his hair. "I'm just going to miss you."

"I'm going to miss you, too, Mum," he whispers as she pulls him closer, pressing kisses to the top of his head. All of a sudden, there's a thunderous pounding of feet from upstairs. "Kids are up," Jay says, giving Louis a smile. "They've been so excited to see you."

"Well, who wouldn't?" Harry mumbles, nudging Louis teasingly. "Shut it," Louis mutters, his ears turning red. Soon enough, he's being enveloped in numerous hugs.

"Louis, you've been gone so long!" squeals Doris.

"Look at you, kiddo!" Louis exclaims. "I swear you've grown three inches since the last time I saw you."

The five year old beams up at him, showing off her missing tooth. "Mummy marks it on the wall every time I grow," she says proudly. Her smile fades, breaking Louis' heart, and she looks up at him with fear-filled eyes. "Do you love us anymore?"

"Of course I still love you," Louis says, pulling her into his lap and pushing her thin hair behind her ear. "Why would you think that I don't love you?"

"Mummy said you were getting a new family to love," she says, looking up at him with wide, curious eyes.

"Just because I'm getting a new family doesn't mean I don't love you guys," Louis assures her, his gaze sliding to meet his mother's, who shrugs as if to say 'I don't know where they come up with this stuff'. "Listen, it doesn't matter if you don't see me often. I will always love you no matter where I am or who I'm with."

"Then we'll see you a lot more?" she asks hopefully and Louis doesn't have it in him to break her little heart.

"I'm afraid not, love," Jay tells her and her face falls.

"Why not?" she asks, her lower lip quivering and Louis knows that she won't possibly comprehend the situation they've gotten themselves into. "Harry and I are going on a very long trip," he tells her, choosing his words carefully, "and I don't know when we'll be getting back. We'll try to keep in touch with Mummy and you all as best we can, though."

She furrows her little brow, chewing on her cheek. "Okay," she says slowly, looking up at him skeptically, but she must be satisfied because she slides off his lap to chase after her brother. The older twins eye him warily before hurrying off after their younger siblings. Louis is disappointed; he'd figured that his family would be more excited to see him but he puts it on Fizzy having left since the last time he was home and the place seems a little more empty than it does full.

"I won't even be able to say goodbye to them," Louis murmurs, knotting his fingers together. Harry rubs his thigh as Jay flashes him a look of sympathy. The older two of all his younger siblings have already left the nest, starting their own lives out in the world. He remembers when they were both so young, just beginning to grasp the concept of the world outside the place they called home. After all, they were the only two who he really got to watch grow up before he moved out and it feels  _wrong_  to not be able to say goodbye to them.

 

They've only spent one day at Jay's when things turn from bad to worse. It's late in the evening, and everyone else has gone to bed. Harry and Louis are settled in Louis' old bed, settling down with some late night television when there's a sudden pounding on the front door downstairs.

"Harry," Louis squeaks, gripping Harry's arm as his alpha stiffens.

"Shhh, it's all right," Harry soothes, stroking his omega's cheek as the knocking continues. Harry mutes the television, hunkering further into the sheets with Louis pressed closer to him.

"Harry, what if—?"

"Shhh, love," Harry soothes, dropping a kiss to the top of his head. "Everything is going to be all right."

"I'm so scared, Harry," Louis murmurs. "What if they've found us? Harry—" He cuts himself off when the sound of his step-father answering the door carries up the stairs.

"What do you want?" he asks tiredly. "It's two in the morning. Haven't you people got anything better to do?"

"We're here on specific orders," comes the gruff reply. "It's come to our attention that your family has been harboring a pair of criminals."

"Harry," Louis whimpers, his grip on Harry's arm tightening.

"Louis, we're going to have to surrender," Harry whispers as soothingly as he can.

"They'll take our memories," Louis whimpers.

"If we give in, they might show some mercy. I mean, you're pregnant for Christ's sake," Harry whispers. "I promise, I will keep you and the baby safe, whatever happens to us."

Jay scurries in, her mouth pulled into a tight line. "Listen to me, you two," she whispers. "Mark is down there distracting them. He realizes what's at stake and what could possibly happen to us."

"Mum," Louis starts, but she holds up a hand, effectively silencing him. "You two need to get out of here now."

"What's going to happen to you?" Harry asks and she closes her eyes. "I don't know," she admits, "but we all know what'll happen to the two of you if you don't leave now." Harry nods and throws the sheets off of him, reaching under the bed to grab their bags, which they hadn't bothered unpacking due to the short length of their stay and the fact that Harry had anticipated something like this.

"Mum," Louis whispers, unable to find his voice. His mother has always protected him, but  _this_ , this is something he will never be able to repay her for, if ever.

"Louis, darling," she says, cupping his cheeks. "I love you. Don't you worry about us, just focus on keeping yourselves safe."

"Mum, I can't—" he chokes.

"Yes, you can, darling," she tells him and presses a kiss to his forehead. Harry takes up Louis' fingers in his own and Louis squeezes back so hard he's sure he's nearly broken Harry's fingers. "There's a staircase in the back of the house. There's a corridor at the bottom of it. Take the first right you see and keep going no matter what. Goodbye, darling. I love you." And with that, she hurries out the door leaving them to themselves for just a fraction of a second before Harry snaps into action, pulling Louis into the hall as quickly and quietly as he can. They find the staircase and the room below, looking like a cement cave under the single flickering fluorescent light. Harry fumbles with his phone, tapping on his flashlight app. "Ready?" he asks as the light flickers them into darkness, save for the light on Harry's phone. Louis doesn't reply vocally, not able to trust his voice, instead opting to squeeze Harry's hand as they start down the stressed tunnel.

 

They don't speak until the cement floor devolves into hard packed dirt and the walls incasing them look even more worn and weather damaged.

"How did she know about this?" Louis asks, his voice hoarse from nearly five hours of silence. "This thing stretches for miles. It looks ancient."

"You'll have to ask her if we ever see her again," Harry mutters.

"Harry," Louis mumbles, feeling the tears prickle. "I wish you hadn't said that."

Harry turns on his heel, horror stricken as he realizes what he's said. "Oh, Louis, please don't cry," he coos. "I didn't mean it; it just slipped out."

"I know, and I'm sorry," Louis apologizes through a sniffle. "It's these damn hormones."

"It's okay, you're okay, I'm here," Harry soothes, hugging him tightly.

"Oi!"

Harry tightens his hold on Louis, scanning their surroundings for intruders in the dim light. "Are you armed?" asks a voice.

"No," Harry answers.

A figure draws into the light. It's a man, bulging muscles visible, covered in sweat and patches of dirt. There's a thin scar stretching its way across his right cheek. His right eye is a pale, pale blue. Louis suspects that its discoloration is due to the scar reaching above his brow. "Well that's mental. You're gonna need some sort of weapon if you want to ward off the oldies at food times."

"Excuse me?" Harry asks, ushering Louis behind him.

"Sorry. I'm always forgetting to introduce meself," he says, offering his hand. "'m Greg Horan. Welcome to reality."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> action!!! omg!!!!  
> just a fair warning, things really won't be getting better for them. :/
> 
>  
> 
> [my tumblr](http://dirtshag.tumblr.com/)


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fair warning, this chapter is a little angsty but there's a lot of protective!harry and vulnerable!louis and some fluff.
> 
> so sorry this took so long!!!! i've been kind of stuck and it was hard to build the camp in my head and get it into words. and i've been struggling with what's going to happen next. it's in my head, but i can't get it into words, so please bear with me!!!!
> 
> thank you for being so patient with me <3
> 
>  
> 
> sexual harassment and implied eating disorder trigger warning. stay safe!!!

"You must be Harry and Louis. Niall's told me a lot about you two. Well, come on. Don't be shy. None of the locals bite." Greg cracks a toothy grin and leads them further down the tunnel, now made completely of hard packed earth as it lets in more light. Greg lets them stand at the opening, looking out over the rubble of what used to be sprawling suburbs. Now, there’s nothing but rubble and tumbleweeds. The rising sun casts a subtle glow that would be beautiful if it weren't illuminating such a sad looking place. “It’s not pretty,” Greg agrees, as if reading their minds, “but it’s a home. It’s a safe place. Well, it’s as safe a place as it’s going to get. Come on. I’ll show you around.”

"Louis, stay behind me," Harry mutters as Greg leads the way through the rubble. Louis huddles behind Harry, his hands clutching at the hem of Harry's sweater. The camp is quite rundown; there's barbed wire surrounding it and there are barrels on fire every hundred feet. Save for a long, wide building, a smaller stout one, and the only, shabby two storey impressive in comparison, there aren't any proper buildings, just tent-shack hybrids, really. The people aren't in much better shape, dressed in ragged clothing and their faces smeared with dirt and scars. Louis wonders how long they've been here.

Greg leads them into a small shack-like tent further into the heart of the camp. "This will be your living quarters. It's not much, but it's as safe as it's going to get. Me and Denise are right next door, so if you need anything, just come over."

"Thank you," Harry murmurs, sweeping his eyes around the tiny space.

"Oh, I almost forgot," Greg says, reaching into his pack to produce two smaller packs. "You're going to need these. There's a first aid kit, emergency supplies, and some rations in each one. Don't worry, though, we usually have enough food to go round," he adds quickly when he notices Louis' pallor. "Anyway, that's it for now. We'll have orientation at six, right before dinner. Make yourselves comfortable." And with that, he sweeps out, leaving them to let the entirety of their situation fully sink in.

Louis bites back his tears, but they fall anyway and Harry is there, wiping them away and cooing at him. "We're going to be okay, Lou," he mumbles.

"All we've got is two cots, Harry," Louis whimpers. "We can't even sleep together." Harry is always holding him close, his longer limbs wrapped around Louis' smaller frame, acting as a shield as he sleeps on the side of the bed closer to the door. He's always touching him, whether it be holding him like Louis is partial toward, or his ankle hooked around Louis', or his arm draped over his body and tucking his body closer to Harry's. He treats Louis as if he fears he's immensely breakable, his touch always soft and gentle and subtly claiming, though Louis highly doubts Harry needs to show off that Louis is taken. Louis doesn’t know if he can sleep without feeling Harry draped over him.

"Shhh," Harry soothes, rubbing circles into his back and Louis nuzzles into the familiar comfort of his touch. "We'll just push 'em together so it'll feel like the same bed, yeah? Don't cry, love," he murmurs, pulling Louis into his chest. "We're gonna be okay."

"Harry, what about my doctors' visits? How are we going to keep the baby healthy?" Louis asks, pressing his hands to his tummy.

Harry drops a few kisses to the top of his head. He hadn’t even thought about that. He was so caught up in getting them to safety so there would  _be_  a future to think about that it hadn’t even crossed his mind. "We'll figure something out, love," he murmurs, cupping his hand against the swell of Louis' tummy.

 

"Now, a few ground rules," Greg starts. "Do not go further than the fence without a weapon. There's a war out there that you're not a part of—and we don’t intend on having you joining it. Of course, if you'd like to join, please speak with one of the officers on duty. The kitchen is open from five a.m. to ten p.m. It's expected that everyone be in their quarters by eleven o’ clock sharp each night. Myself or another officer will be stopping by shortly thereafter to take a headcount. If you are not in your quarters by eleven, it will be marked vacant and another refugee will be moved in. Is that clear?" There's a ripple of assent that works its way through the sizable group of newcomers. There are many couples, but only a few have children with them. There is an alarming number of young children with no parents. "Children under twelve should be accompanied at all times. If you are under twelve and are here alone, please make your way over to Denise, where you will be assigned a family to quarter with." A good half of the children get to their feet and wander up to the table where Denise is sat at.

"Harry, look at them," Louis whispers, his heart breaking when he catches sight of a little girl no older than seven clutching the hand of a boy that can’t be any older than four.

"I know, Louis," Harry whispers, giving his hand a squeeze, "but we're here so that doesn't happen to our baby." Louis sighs and tears his gaze from the orphaned children, returning his attention to Greg as he goes over more safety rules. When he's done addressing them all, Harry tugs Louis along. "Greg," he says. "Are there any doctors around by chance?"

"Course there are," he says, knitting his brow. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Harry rushes. "It's just that Louis here is pregnant and—"

"Say no more," Greg says, giving him a smile. "We've got a doctor on the south side of camp. Course there's not so much of her equipment around, but she does her best with what she’s got like the rest of us. I'll send someone over to show you her place tomorrow."

"Thank you so much," Harry gushes and Greg gives him a smile. "No problem," he says. "Dinner's in ten. I think it's chicken," he says and walks over to Denise, where she's still helping kids.

 

Dinner itself is unspectacular. The food wasn’t as good as either of them had expected, but this is a refugee camp, not a five star restaurant, so it could have been worse. Harry and Louis stay close to each other, trying hard not to make eye contact with the other refugees. Greg had assured them that they'd make friends eventually, but there are a lot of unmated alphas around here and Harry’s not too sure they want to be friends, assuming from the way their eyes linger on Louis for longer than he’d like. Louis isn’t unattractive in the least bit and Harry knows that people are going to look at him no matter what, but the way those alphas lick their lips when they watch him really unsettles him. Louis is Harry’s mate and Harry thinks his scent combined with that of the baby’s should discourage them from trying anything, but even from this being their first night in, he’s beginning to have his doubts. It starts with one of the alphas approaching them where they’re sat by themselves. He saunters over like he owns the place and leans on the flimsy table, looking smug as Louis drops his gaze to his plate.

“What’s a dainty little flower like you doing in a place like this?” the alpha asks, running his dirty fingertips against the line of Louis’ jaw. Louis doesn’t look up to meet his eyes, so the alpha forces his chin up. “I asked you a question,” he growls, digging the tips of his fingers further into Louis’ skin.

“Don’t fucking touch him,” Harry growls and the alpha lazily makes eye contact with him. “Yeah?” he asks. “What’re you gonna do about it?”

Harry gets to his feet and the alpha takes a step back, his eyes wide. Other than that, he tries to hide his fear, but Harry can smell it on him. He has to give him props, though, because even Harry knows how scary he can look when provoked. He doesn’t blame this guy for shrinking back a bit. “I’ll snap your neck,” he threatens quietly and the alpha scoffs. “You’ll get thrown out of here,” he says. “Look, I know you’re new here and all that shit, but Greg doesn’t allow violence in his camp.”

“He also doesn’t condone sexual harassment,” Harry spits back, making the alpha flinch ever so slightly. “Listen to me, you lay a fucking finger on him and I’ll break both your legs and  _personally_  throw you out.”

The other alpha shifts ever so slightly, his brow dampening with sweat as he swallows hard. “I’m not afraid of you,” he says and Harry smirks. “Sure you aren’t. Listen, I know what kind of nasty shit is out there,” he says. “You don’t want to be out there on your own.  _Especially_  with broken legs.” The alpha stares at him for a moment, audibly swallowing before shuffling off. Harry watches him scuttle away, feeling proud of himself until he hears Louis’ soft whimpers. “Louis, love, what’s wrong?” he asks, turning around to face the poor omega, absolutely terrified that he’s done something wrong.

“Nothing, it’s nothing,” Louis mutters, scrubbing at his eye.

“It’s not nothing,” Harry says softly, gently easing Louis’ chin up. “Something’s made you upset. What is it?”

“I’m sorry,” Louis whispers, “I know it’s what you’re supposed to do, but I hate seeing you get like that. It’s terrifying to see you so mad. Anger… is not an emotion that has been conveyed well around me.”

“Don’t be sorry,” Harry murmurs. “I should be the sorry one, and I am. I didn’t mean to scare you. I just want to keep you safe.”

“I know,” Louis mumbles and Harry presses a kiss to his forehead. “Eat your stuff, love,” he murmurs as Louis pushes around the food on his plate. Louis nods obediently as Harry presses another kiss to his temple, not wanting to mention how he’s noticed that Louis has been barely eating the past few weeks. Harry wishes that Louis would see himself the way he does, but he knows that Nick’s damage has already been done. There’s no telling how much of his abuse Louis has hidden from him and Harry wants to help, but he knows Louis needs his time. He watches Louis take small bites, glaring at any other alpha whose gaze lingers on Louis.

***

The second time Louis gets harassed a few weeks later, Harry is completely livid. He'd been standing right beside him when another alpha walks past, giving Louis' bum a quick squeeze as he passes by. Louis lets out a small squeak at the unexpected grope and Harry snorts in anger, making a move to go after the horny piece of shit. Louis then holds him back and pleads with him to just let it go, that the asshole isn't worth getting them kicked out of the only safe place they have left. Harry just sighs and holds him closer, dropping a kiss to the top of his head. “Louis, this place can’t be safe for us anymore if you keep getting harassed like this,” he mumbles.

“Harry, I know you don’t like it—“

“Do you?” Harry asks suddenly and Louis stares up at him, his mouth hanging open. “Do you honestly think I do?” he asks incredulously. “Are you seriously asking if I enjoy being stared at like a fucking piece of meat free for the taking?” Harry doesn’t say anything and Louis shoves away from him. “I can’t believe you,” he spits, feeling the tears sting the backs of his eyes. “Do you honestly think I _like_ being harassed, Harry? I put up with this shit so that we don’t lose our memories. I can’t believe I ever thought you were a good alpha. Sometimes you’re just as bad as Nick.”

“What?” Harry breathes. He feels like his breath has been knocked out of his lungs; Louis thinks he’s like Nick. He swore to Louis that he’d keep him safe and happy, but they’re as far from either of those as they can possibly get.

“Nick,” Louis says, glaring at him. “I said you’re exactly like Nick.”

“Louis, please,” Harry pleads. “You know that’s not true.”

“Get your head out of your ass, then,” Louis snaps and storms away. Harry hurries after him because those unmated alphas could be lurking anywhere and he doesn’t doubt for a second they’d try something with Louis. He catches up to him in just four long strides, his long legs proving to be an advantage. Louis doesn’t look at him or even turn around, but he does come to a stop.

“Louis, everything I do is to protect you,” Harry says softly. “You know that.”

“Of course I know that,” Louis mutters. “Anyone could smell the copious amounts of testosterone you put off. Hell, I probably smell like an alpha just from standing next to you.”

Harry shrinks back a bit. “I don’t know what possessed me to say that, Louis,” he says softly. “I was angry and overreacted. I didn’t mean it.”

Louis puffs out a breath of air, finally turning around to face Harry. “I know you didn’t mean it,” he says, “but how could you even think that I enjoy this shit. You _know_ what shit he put me through.”

“I know, and I am so, so sorry for even thinking something like that,” Harry says, his voice sounding strained. “Are we okay?” Louis sighs, wrapping his arms around himself. Harry moves closer to wrap his arms around him and Louis doesn’t draw away as far as Harry thought he would. Harry smoothes his hands up and down Louis’ arms, hoping to warm him in the uncharacteristically chilly air for mid July. “Us fighting really isn’t good for the baby,” he mumbles and Louis sighs deeply. “No,” he agrees. “Not at all.”

“So we’re okay?” Harry asks lightly.

Louis nuzzles into his chest. “Yeah,” he mumbles. “I can’t stay mad at you for long, can I?” Harry chuckles softly, dropping a kiss to the top of his head, but Louis is still a little uneasy about Harry’s sudden inquisition. He knows Harry is anxious about those alphas and the fact that they’re outlaws with a baby on the way. He’s fairly certain that Harry only acted the way he did because he’s scared, but much too alpha to admit it. Louis supposes that he can forgive him, or rather that he has to simply to survive. Harry has a heart of pure gold, though, and Louis isn’t quick to forget that Harry rescued him from the nightmare of Nick. “We’re okay,” he mumbles.

***

Louis struggles to get comfortable on the flimsy cot. Harry hasn't complained about them, but then again, his back isn't sore from carrying a baby. He's only a little over three months along now and the baby seems to have decided that it wants its presence known because he was barely showing a few weeks ago, but now he has a little rounded bump that he adores and Harry can't keep his hands off of and even _that_ hasn't put off that group of alphas. He sighs, running his fingers over the swell of his belly and gets to his feet, hoping a nice walk will straighten things out. He slips out of the makeshift door and into the chill of the moonlit night. He'd be freezing if he hadn't had the sense to snatch one of Harry's sweaters.

There are rows upon rows of these little tents, each one filled with sleeping refugees, so he tries his best to keep his footsteps light. He lets his mind wander as he walks, thinking about what the future will hold for him and Harry. They can't stay here after the baby is born. They'll have to slip back into the city and stay under the radar as best they can. He refuses to raise his child in a place like this. It may be a haven to people in hiding, but it's the furthest thing away from safe for a newborn. He subconsciously rubs his stomach, wondering if Harry will agree with him, when he hears a shuffling sound. He looks around, his skin prickling with goose bumps as the sound gets closer. He panics, ducking into a random tent, waking a burly looking alpha, who scowls at him.

"Oi! What do you think you're doing?" he hisses and Louis fish-mouths as the alpha squints at him. "You're that omega, aren't you?" he asks and Louis' breathing hitches in his throat. "I haven't been with an omega in years," the alpha nearly growls, his pupils widening.

Louis squeaks in response and slips out of the tent, running as fast as his legs will carry him. When he takes his third right turn, he realizes that he doesn't know where his and Harry's tent is at. He whines in frustration before thinking that if he can find the bathrooms, he can make his way back to Harry. It's an awful plan considering the alpha hunting him down, but it's all he has, so he works on finding the bathrooms, moving as quickly as he can. He weaves his way through the rows, listening intently for the alpha's heavy footsteps. He doesn't know how anyone has stayed asleep with the oaf stomping around on his heavy flat feet. He finally reaches the bathroom after what feels like hours and traces his way back to his and Harry's tent, where he scurries back in and Harry bolts awake.

"Whass going on?" he asks blearily and Louis shushes him, hurrying over. "I may or may not have a horny alpha after me," he whispers and Harry's eyes widen. "Louis, I told you not to go out after curfew," he says, but does not scold. Harry treats him as an equal, and that's a hard quality to find in an alpha. Harry presses a kiss to his forehead and gets to his feet. "Stay here," he says.

"Harry—" Louis protests, starting after him, but Harry forces him back. "Louis, if he gets his hands on you, he could hurt you or the baby," he says softly. "I don't want to risk your safety, so please, just stay here."

Louis wants to respond that he doesn't want to risk Harry's safety, but he just gives a small nod and shrinks back as Harry slips out the tent. He sinks onto Harry's cot, wrapping himself in his sleep warm blankets that smell exactly like him. He curls in on himself, making himself as small as possible, and prays that Harry will be back soon. He wonders what he would do if Harry suddenly disappeared not for the first time. He imagines he would cry for days upon days and weeks upon weeks and months upon months. He'd be so utterly vulnerable; biology has made it nearly impossible for carrying omegas to survive without their alphas. Betas are stronger, so they can manage single parenthood, but an omega would be impossibly lucky to even survive the entirety of its pregnancy without a mate. An alpha keeps its omega protected and well taken care of and carrying omegas desperately need to be taken care of. If Harry doesn't come back, Louis' chances of survival drop to zero. He lets out a sob as the sound of growls and punches landing filter through the paper-thin walls. He's still crying silently when the sounds fade into whimpers and Harry slips back in. "Louis," his whispers and Louis draws back the blankets, peering up at his alpha as Harry stands over him before stuffing his face into the pillow.

"I'm so fucking useless, Harry," Louis mutters into the pillow. "I'm sorry you got stuck with such a shitty mate."

"Hey, you're not useless," Harry coos, rolling him over and cupping Louis' cheeks and eases him to meet his eyes.

"I can't even protect myself, Harry," Louis snaps, his gaze hardening.

"Louis, that's my job," Harry tells him gently.

"I'm sorry I'm such a burden," Louis whispers. "I mean, I'm so emotional what with the baby and we're stuck in this hellhole and I can’t even go to the loo by myself at night because I can't defend myself against those ravenous alphas. I didn't even listen to you when you told me not to go out after curfew. I mean, what omega disobeys their alpha like that?"

"Louis, that's just part of my job and I'm happy to do it," Harry says. "My job is so impossibly important because it's about keeping you safe. You are not a burden to me and you never will be. I don't want you ever thinking that."

"Harry," Louis mumbles weakly as Harry crouches down to his level, wrapping his arms around the omega, who holds him back as tight as he can. "I was so scared you wouldn't come back," Louis whispers and Harry tightens his hold on him, nuzzling his face into his shoulder. "I'll always come back for you," he promises. "Don't you think for a second that I'm gonna leave you all on your own." He presses a kiss to the side of his neck, rubbing his back. "No, you and I are gonna live 'til we're old and gray with too many grandchildren to count."

“Promise?” Louis asks, pulling away to look him in the eye.

“Promise,” Harry affirms, kissing his lips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> poor louis right??!!
> 
> both in the fic and real life!! his football team didn't work out. poor baby :c
> 
> anyway, thank you for reading!!!! :)
> 
>  
> 
> [my tumblr](http://dirtshag.tumblr.com/)


	15. NOT A CHAPTER

so i've been working on this for a while and i have a different plot than what i started out with??? so i'm planning on editing the whole thing to thicken the plot, bring the subplots further into the story, and hopefully add more scenes. (and i hate that i feel this way because this always happens and i'm never satisfied with my work :/)

i've been busy working on summer homework and my job so i haven't had much time to do that and school starts soon and this year i'm taking quite a few english courses so that's going to be a lot of  _structured_ reading and writing (my least favorite).

i'm not sure if i'm going to keep updating this version or if i'll just post a newer version and update that?? unless you want me to finish this version before i edit it????

 

also, if anyone would like to beta the newer version for me once i get it started, that would be amazing!! originally, the first chapter was the only one that was beta'd and i need another viewpoint so i know it's understandable.

 

thank you for reading this update!!!

 

please let me know either on here or on [tumblr](http://dirtshag.tumblr.com/) if you'd like to beta for me!! thank you!!!!!


	16. BETA WANTED

hi yes hello

i am in need of a beta because i've been working nearly nonstop on this fic and it currently has more than another extra 10k worth of content.

i think i'm done with at least the first chapter (which is just like the first three original mashed up with more stuff), but i'm having trouble filling a blank space??

if you'd like to beta for me, i would love you forever <3

plus you'll get a sneak peak of every chapter before i post :))))

please let me know asap either in the comments here or head on over to my [tumblr](http://dirtshag.tumblr.com/ask).

thank you much!!!!!!


	17. UPDATE

hey!!! i posted the prologue to the revised version. from now on i will be updating that version. you don't have to read the new version if you don't want to, but i added more to louis and harry's relationship before everything falls apart :)

but keep in mind that if you choose to pick up where i left off here, there will be details that you'll have missed and things will be a bit more confusing.

i'm planning on combining a lot of the chapters so they'll be a lot longer than roughly 2000 words per chapter.

thank you so much for putting up with me. i'm a loser and an asshole. sorry :/


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